The Will of Magic
by rain35454
Summary: 5 years after the battle of Camlann, they have completed their destiny's. But there is a new trouble that going to test the will of new Albion peace and that is the queen as become barren. So fearing war would tear apart the kingdom for Arthur throne Gwen decides to choice the mother of the her husband child. With a bit of magic to turn him in to a girl she as pick Merlin.
1. Chapter 1(fixed)

**Hello and thanks for checking out my story. Now this is my first story so I ask you to please use constructive criticism when reviewing and if you have any ideas for this story I have open ears, hope you enjoy.**

**I don't own or get money from this story it is only for fun. **

**Info: Arthur and Mordred battle at Camlann. Arthur was wounded in battle but was saved by Merlin, and Mordred died because Morgana runaway instead of following after Merlin. Merlin still revels his magic to Arthur so magic is no longer banned from Camelot and together they unite all of Albion. The story is set 5 years later under Arthur's rule. Aithusa is alive and lives with the great dragon.**

**Warning: fem/Merlin, slash, Merlin x Arthur, birthing, character death, Het, gender bender, Gwen x Arthur.**

The Will of Magic

In a time of myth and legend there was once a great destiny that rested upon the shoulders of a young boy his name Merlin, but that destiny has long been filed by him and his other side of the coin Arthur. Who had now united all the lands of Albion under one rule and had freed magic users from being hunted from every corner of the land, just as the legend said it would be.

5 years later the people still rejoiced in the glory of Albion's golden years and under the rule of their one true king. Who leads the people with his courage to defeat any danger that comes their way, along with his most powerful wizard who used his mystical powers to bring more prosperity to the kingdoms.

The future was everything they hope for. So Merlin and his friends settled down into their peaceful lives to life out the rest of their own in glories days.

That however all began to change for them when Gwen's monthly bleeding came but was no longer a healthy heavy flow it used to be, it instead lasted barely three days.

She was told of the signs of being barren from an older maid that was assigned to train Gwen in the workings of the castle when she was nothing but a young girl who was still raw to the recent lost her mother. The woman taught her the new duties of being a servant, but she also took pity on the girl who had no one else to talk to about her body, she told her everything that she need to know about her growing body. What was normal and what was something she needs to worry about. Now as a married woman she was concerned for the older maid told her the only time a woman should run dry is when she is either old, starved or sick. So she decided to quickly seek answers to the only one she could trust to plainly give them to her. Donned on a plain looking blue dress to make her blend into the milling crowd better for when she walked outside of the castle walls and into the upper town.

It work just enough for her found a small wooded home the insides she knew to be just like a scholar's workshop that is filled with books, papers and experiments that are piled in an organized but messy fashion. Where a now retired Gaius lived with his wife Alice. She went straight inside without knocking or greeting as she quickly grabbed Alice away from the writing desk where she was about to write something down and took her to another room for more privacy to ask for her help. Being that Alice was the only physician she knew of that was a woman and that also lived within a walkable distance, she was the only one Gwen felt comfortable asking her about this. The last thing she needed was the add embarrassment of asking Gaius or their new physician Flinn, if her womanly parts still worked properly. So along with the loud thumping of her heart that was beating inside her ears and nervousness that filed her fears of what she may well know to be true, Gwen waited for the answer.

A empathic Alice delivered the news as gently as possible, she wasn't completely barren but the chance that she would became with child were slim and those chances would most likely continue to decrease, until there was no longer a possibility of an pregnancy.

Gwen asked if anything can be done to fix her, with a firm shake of her head Alice said, "I can only give you potions that would increase your chances of convincing but it won't stop the changes that will make you losing your ability to make life."

"What about magic?" Gwen asked, still holding out for hope for a better chance of a solution then the one Alice words was suggesting. "With Merlin's powers surely he can easily perform any spell we needed, there could still be a way around this!" she continued, growing more hopeful as every word spilled out of her mouth.

Alice wither at her queens words and said, "The only spell that could create a child where there cannot be one is the spell that Uther use to give life to Arthur. At the time people were testing the limits of magic and nature, so a spell to make a person fertile without trading someone's life was something everyone wanted to create especial the nobles. People tried everything, mostly using healing magic to try to return what had been lost but even when bodily functions returned back to normal there was never an offspring from those people." Alice looks off to the side in though and muttered, "It was as if nature itself refused to bend for any one will no matter the power they held or how much the parents wished for the child."

All hope was crushed in Gwen, like a stronghold castle that had withered to dust by the passage of time and the pieces blown away in a great wind so that nothing remain on that piece of land but emptiness. Tears came into Gwen eyes and flowed down her cheeks, Alice leant towards the Queen and gave her a shoulder to lean into and a comforting hand to rube her back with while Gwen gravely sobbed into her neck.

For not only had she failed the whole of Albion and it people that she loved dearly. But most importantly she had failed Arthur and herself, for she would never became a loving mother, never make Arthur a father whose child would look up to him. A child that had Arthur's leadership or braveness and Gwen's kindness, they would never experience a baby first steps or words; they would never even know the happiness of loving a child. Gwen knew Alice said that she still had a small chance, but this feeling of uselessness that came over her when Alice told her the truth made her feel as if fate decided that she would be childless and she has no choice but to play the part.

_Gwen POV_

Arthur tried to be the strong one for her, when she told him later that same day, but she knew her husband was trying to cover his true emotions, to try to play the strong leader and husband that could get them out of any problem they faced. But when she told him Alice said that she wasn't completely barren it made Arthur still hang on to the small hope that they could still have an heir. But something inside Gwen was still telling her that it wouldn't work, that this is her fate to accept. Maybe it was the tragedy of it all that made her give up hope, but that feeling never left her in the days that come.

For every night for a month Arthur would desperately, but lovingly try to get Gwen with child, making love into the night until early the next morning. Both of them didn't get much sleep that month. Gwen would have enjoyed that more if she wasn't reminded why Arthur was doing all this, but it would always hit her after their daily lovemaking. She would look to her left to see a sweating, naked Arthur looking at her with a hopeful sparkly look in his ocean blue eyes. Then the feeling of uselessness came back, dragging along with it the feeling of pointlessness of it all that would drain her of any happiness she have had when she looked back at him.

Gwen never said a word about her feelings to Arthur, he would just think that she had giving up the last hope they had. He then would work harder to try to prove himself right for her sake. Then the second week of the next month came, making them realize that her normal bleeding cycle hadn't come as usual.

At first she rejoiced along with Arthur. She was busting at the seams with joy, like a small dress that had be fitted over a too large body, to the point that she truly would have be skipping up and down the halls like a young girl again who had just been kissed by her crush, not the respected queen she was.

But then on the inside she knew she didn't feel like one should when you are with child. She didn't feel sick or crave food, nor did she feel dizzy and her breasts wasn't getting any bigger. She felt fine, like it was any other day. She tried telling Arthur this, so he be prepare for the worst as she was deep inside. But Grinning as he walk her down to Flinn, he refuse to listen to a word she said, feeling high off of the victory of believing he had beaten nature itself. That would just make the news into a harder blow for him to take, when Flinn official dubbed her that horrid word, barren.

He then turn desperate in front of Flinn just as she had before Alice and then he thought of the same answers that she had. Hoping magic could help him he asking advice from both Gaius and Merlin, but it had ended up with the same horrible conclusion that Arthur would never do, even under threat of death. So that night Arthur finally accepted it, as she did and they held each other crying of their loss together. They grieved for so long that they fall asleep on their bed, still in their clothes, clinging tightly to one other.

So that the next day they had the misfortune of appearing before the court red eyes and weak spirited, as Arthur hoarsely told the courtyard of people that they could not make them an heir to look for future leadership of Albion. Many condolences were given to them that day, especial from close friends and Gwen's brother. They tried to make her feel like it wasn't her fault and she was so grateful to have true friends who would speak those words to her, but even with the words of encouragement came to her ears she could feel nothing but being a failure. Maybe as time passed this wound would heal and she could accept her friend's words as the truth someday.

A least the court left them mostly alone, giving them time to grieve and leaving them be for another month. But after that some of the people in the castle were giving them small concerned looks whenever they were together, in the meetings or when they were walking down the halls of the castle. When Gwen saw those looks she would hear a small voice whispering inside of her, "they want to know what you are willing to do for the future of the Albion." The staring people never said a word to her, but the look in their eyes said what they wanted, even when their mouth didn't.

Gwen knew could not be truly angry with them for worrying about how this was going to impact their own future. She knew how it felt to have everything you loved balanced on the wills of others, that don't know you or may not even care about what happens to you and how truly scared you felt down to your core off that one person who could destroy you with just whisper of a word. Gwen had felt just the same, before she really got to see who Arthur was, but the people knew that they were better off than in any other royal reign. They knew their rulers would almost do anything for the prosperity of the kingdom. Besides that the people, they thought, weren't showing signs of being extremely concerned, so they assumed that the people would be willing to wait for them to make a plan in maybe a few years. So Gwen brush off the looks.

But they were wrong about that, blinded from the kindness of others at that time, but it didn't show until a few months later at a round table meeting. A middle aged adviser suddenly stood up, when Arthur was about to dismiss the court and demanded in a loud voice so all could hear him saying, "Your Majesty I know it is unbecoming of me to speak of this since it is only be but a few months since you discovered the news of your queen. But this is a matter of state and being king you are the only one who could chose the path we walk, so I ask you to reveal any plans you have for finding an heir for the great Kingdom of Albion."

Arthur barely hides his annoyance for the boldness of the adviser, for hitting a still sore spot in such an underhand way. He replied back, using a firm but authoritative tone, "As you say it has been only a few months, so I have not thought of an alternate solution for getting an heir and I wish to speak no more of it until I see it fit to."

The adviser didn't sit back down, but continued speaking, trying to make his king see sense, "I am sorry sire, but this is too great a concern to ignore. Your throne is too powerful not to draw the likes of Morgana, through trickery, war, or force. Not appointing an heir will have people arguing if whether the throne is rightfully his to take, which will leave the kingdom in civil war if you allow the people to decide in your place. The best way to keep peace within Albion is to have an heir through your bloodline. I advise you earnestly sire to seek a consort…"

Arthur slammed his hand down on the table making an ear splitting sound that echoed across the room, firmly silencing the adviser. Arthur looked at the adviser with dark calculating eyes, a look that he obviously learned from his father and spoke in the most chilly but calm voice that the council had ever heard come from him, "I said there is to be no more talk of this matter, and when a king gives an order he expects it be followed or your loyalty will start being put under questioning."

The adviser quickly sits back down and Arthur dismissed the meeting with a quick exit. No one dare try to bring it up again, but the words where already out there fluttering around in the air giving more fear to the people, who already stared and whispered in worry to begin with. The man's words did the same to Gwen, they were like a fly buzzing around her head she couldn't see, so no matter how hard you try to bat it away you can't stop it and all you can do is sit there listing to the insanity as it echoed in your head, never to stop. His words could drive a person to dark places of fear, but they also showed how right he was.

Their kingdom was now at peace after years of battling those who hated the uniting of the lands and the freedom of magic. But it wasn't hard to see someone becoming power hunger, when Arthur becomes too old to fight off his enemies. Then his people would start to look for new leadership, to replace the one who was going to die someday. Gwen knew many people would love to sit on the throne that Arthur now sat upon. She can see now why the man risked the king rage, for this hard win peace and this great land they have now. No one wanted to see it not carry on to the next generate correctly or see it be giving to the wrong person that could destroy many future lives.

The Queen would not let that happen, because she wanted to keep her husband to herself and let her emotion devour her. Those feeling that wouldn't let her do what is right for her people, who she vowed to take care of when she married Arthur. She swore she will not be the reason people spilt each other's blood over Arthur throne or be the key that broke apart the land.

If years of being queen had showed her anything it's that sometimes she must take matter in to her own hands instead of waiting for the help of others, who might not have the right intentions for the kingdom. She would take this matter into her own hands as well before others did for her. She decided that she will find the perfect consort for the kingdom, because if she had to share her love with another then she can at least gain a little bit of comfort that it's a woman that she can approve of and one who will give the heir many benefits that could make the child into a great leader as its father is.

In the days that followed Gwen made a list of even single child bearing age woman that she knew off, both personally and long distance people who she could trust to be very loyal to Arthur. She did this secretly from everyone else, especially from Arthur, knowing her husband wouldn't ever want for her to do something like this for the kingdom nor would he help her in seeking another. Like his father did to his own mother, an action that broke his family apart and nearly destroy all else he held dear. So she made it her mission to keep this from everyone else until she found the perfect person. Besides she wanted to base her pick on logic alone and not emotions, biases, greed or other influences that could make her chose the wrong person. She wanted to pick a woman without regret haunting her all her days.

After completing the list that contained the whole of Albion women both noble and peasant. She immediately started marked off the ones who she know to be barren like her or the ones with any illness, then took off the ones that were loyal but hadn't the right personality. She loved her husband but she knew his flaws of being arrogant, stubborn and the tendency to distant himself by hurting others when he was emotionally hurting himself. So having a mother with a personally that at a least balanced some of Arthur flaws was one of her goals. As well as someone that showed great leadership skills, which could make the child life much easier then what Arthur's life had been when he was growing up into the king he is today. Being spoilt as a prince with no real consideration on how to lead his people had resulted in a childhood with a great many hardships that made him have to polish into something great, but she did not wish the same for any ones child.

But even though she marked the list down quite a bit as the days passed, the list still nearly extended across the room, the time it took to go through every woman flaws, education, routine, bad habits, society circles took up weeks and she barely taken even one half of the list off.

As the days turn to weeks others begin to notice her change in behavior and the long amount of time she spend in her bed chambers. As well as her time spend outside the walls of her room asking for information about other woman. Some even began to ask if she wanted to talk about what was wrong, then a new fear grow inside her. Would someone watching her discover her plan, before she could reveal it at the right time? With the stuff she was asking about it could be possible. So she became more careful by hiding the list in her old ballroom gowns chest, the big gowns would cover the long list nicely and she was always getting new ones made so no one would bothered taking out the old dresses. It was a better place to hide it than in her bedroom draw. She only toke it out of the chest when Arthur was out doing his duties and her handmaid had left to do her other chores.

But that didn't make the solution any clearer and Gwen could feel the worried gazes of her people as she walked the halls, could sense the tensioned of the council at the round table when her husband call upon a meeting. This made her anxious more the ever. That anxious sat in the back of her mind clawing at her confidence on finding the perfect person and speaking to the chosen women, before others did something before she could even truly begin to set her plans into action.

To say she became obsessed with it was only the half of it, but the other half was the want to badly fix the problem of the doubts in their peace has quickly as possible. So she was always thinking about that list, to the point that a whole day would pass without her thinking about anything else but of finding the perfect mother.

She was still thinking about it when the celebrations for the 2nd anniversary of Albion peace came around. They celebrated it with a festival ever year around in every city and town throughout Albion. As well as a great feast that is held with in the halls of Camelot castle where they had invited the other royals that helped rule Albion with them, so they could show their gratitude for the support of their reign.

Many have thought that they would cancel the feast, in light of the recites news. But not wanting to over shadow the celebrations of what they achieved with their own personal tragedy they still both attended the banquet, to enjoy the meal for themselves, after all this feast was an award to their people for all their help in making peace across the kingdom. Cancelling the festival would be like them saying they were scared of the future and that they were not grateful for the peoples own efforts for peace. And Gwen mostly wanted to reassure the people, rather than enjoy the meal itself, that peace will still continue. So they gave speeches of encouragement for the future that were made at the beginning of the feast by the king.

As she sat there watching her husband she admire the hall that is decorated beautiful with all the crests of the royals on banners that helped to co-rule the lands of Albion on show being hang around the room, the biggest hanging in the front of the room above the throne was of course Camelot's proud golden dragon on a red banner. Candles were lit, flowers covering ever surface that wasn't going to be used. People who would be selling their wares along the streets, a circus had come to entertain the people along the street and inside the hall during the feast, with has an magical show to go along with it.

Their best wine was served, a clear wine that tasted of honey and spices that held a very strong smell to it, which floated across the room once it was brought up from the cellar floor. Roast pork glazed in honey that made it shine bright and brought the smell of sweetened meat that mixed well with the others smells of the room. They also served rabbit and poultry both having a delightful mustard sauce smothered on top of them. Along with many different cheeses and fruits which were served by there side. All the food delicious and the people merry, some a little too much from the honey spice wine.

So they easily ate the delicious foods that sat in front of them, Arthur sitting on the left of Gwen and her best friend Merlin sitting on the right with all the other knights sitting close around joining in on the fun. But even with all her loved ones close by to bring her into the conversation, her happiness never lasted very long for she would just give a few short clipped words before her mind was dragging back up into the clouds by that list again. After a while they give up on trying to engage their Queen in conversation and left her in peace with her thoughts. The others kept the mood light, by telling stories of some of their adventures, but as the night became late and they got drunker the weirder and funnier the tales became, it almost became a contesting for them of who could tell the most ridiculous story, Gwen wasn't really paying much attention to them until she heard the words.

"But no one could ever top Merlin turning himself into a woman!" Arthur nearly shouted across the table, from the redness of his face and the way he had little control of his own voice Arthur was on the edge of drunkenness makes a person lose control of themselves in the funnies ways.

Merlin's face was red as well, but Gwen guess was probably not from the wine. He pointed his finger at Arthur, like a wife scalding her husband, and said in a defensive tone, "It was either turn into the old woman or get arrested. I couldn't use Dragoon anymore because he was more than likely to get arrested on site and I doubt you would let me do what I needed to do if I had told you the truth."

After years of working together to overcome Merlin's trust issues and Arthur past of hating magic users they had come to accept the past as it is. Now that they were no longer hurting from it they laugh about it now. Which is what Arthur and the knights did when they remembered Merlin old woman. Some almost falling out of their chairs with laughter, probably more from the drink then the funny situation Merlin keeps putting himself into. Gwen could almost envision it now, not the old woman for she had never seen her, but a younger version with long straight black hair that run pass her pointed jaw line with curvy hips and breasts. He would have make a pretty, kind, smart girl Gwen thought. Gwen then grew curious, did Merlin truly turn did into a complete girl, or was it a trick?

Gwen leant over to him, since the others drunken laughter's became too loud to talk normally and asked, "Did you use an illusion spell to make yourself look that way?"

Merlin smiled at her, happy that she had join in with them, even if the topic was about one of his more embarrassing stunts. So in what she learnt now was his teaching voice he said, "Nope, complete transformation into the fairer gender, since the only way you can make an illusion to make you look different is to steal another person's face. But then there is the risk running into somebody who could tell you are not who you say you are or if goddesses forbid if the person themselves shows up." Merlin cross his arms and signs before he said, "Then there a way to see through the illusion all together and that the caster reflection. For the reflection isn't effect by magic and always revels the truth."

Gwen still founds it hard to believe when she learn that a force that can bend the world around to the needs of a single person can be ruined by a flaw like a simple reflection.

"Is that why you use a transform spell? Because you were worry that someone would accidently see through to the truth?" she asked.

Merlin points his finger at to her and says, "Or get someone else into trouble by using their face."

The drunken Arthur not quite done making fun of Merlin asks him mockingly, "How was it being a girl?"

Merlin decided to make light of his friend teasing by answering him with the truth, "Well Arthur I felt the someway I did when I was an old man, sore and tire of trying to dragging around a whinny prat. So he could seem like he was the hero who saved the kingdom once again."

Arthur pouted, his way of telling Merlin that he did not approve of his mockery of him and Merlin simple chuckled back. Gwen don't listen to the rest of teasing because there was a thought growing in her head and it refused to be dismissed from her mind, a crazy thought, but one that could solve her problems. She calmly asked Merlin another question, one that would be key to completing her crazy idea, "couldn't you just turn yourself into a young girl instant of an old woman?"

Merlin shrugged his shoulder looking a little bit sleepiest and said, "I don't want even chance of being recognize, so I figure we all look different when we are older and it was a better use of the spell so I could get away with my plan."

"So you could have made yourself into a real young girl?" She said and Merlin nodded to affirm, he looked a little confused on why she questioning him so much about him changing his gender, but was quickly distracted when one of the other knights pulled him into another conservation.

Gwen just kept looking at Merlin, seeing him as a girl that she envisaged earlier, rather than the man now sitting next to her. Technically if what Merlin said was the truth he may be able to conceive a child like any other normal girl his age.

Merlin would make a perfect mother, with his kindness that shines through even at the darkest of times, he was great leader as shown when he helped bring back magic using peaceful displays to show magic is not evil and rules so none could misuse it again. Then there Merlin's dragon lord bloodline, which should be passed down since Merlin is the last of his kind, even if there were only two dragons left in the world and they wouldn't be reproduce any time soon. But as least the dragon lords wouldn't became existent if the dragons do make the next line. And being poor once himself he would want to make sure to install in his child the gratefulness in what it is given. Much like when he showed Arthur how to be a better ruler when he was just a manservant by his side. There is no question of Merlin's loyalty to do the right thing for the people and if his power is inherited by his child the magic community would be put at ease about not having another purge or misunderstandings again. After all who would most likely be the person the magic users would follow, someone who was appointed to the throne or their Embry's child. With all that she was sure that Merlin would be a great parent to any child and she would feel better about the whole consort thing if Arthur was with someone they both knew as a friend, instead of a stranger. The best part was he would give them, the kingdom and the child all she hoped for the future if Merlin was the mother of Arthur's heir.

Gwen felt relief, and even a little bit excited, to finally have a chance of preserving their kingdom for future generations. But that feeling was dampened by the thought of Arthur's reaction when she told him of her plans; it made her nervous, giving her a flutter in the pit of her stomach. So she decide to wait to tell him until tomorrow, so Arthur could enjoy the celebrating today and so she can figure out how to tell them properly with as little as conflict as possible.

Now she was going to take her own advice in enjoy the rest of the feast and not worrying about a single thing till another day.

Gwen did enjoy that night, as the others didn't suspecting anything from her sudden change of mood and was just happy that whatever was on her mind earlier has left her so she could finally be merry with them.

As she and Arthur were going to bed that night she calmly asked, so as to not hint at the blow she was going to give him, "Arthur can I talk to you tomorrow about something important."

Arthur was still was a little drunk from the feast, so he thought nothing of it and shrugged his shoulders saying, "I can reschedule the tax meeting tomorrow to the next day, to have some free time in the afternoon."

She smiled in approval and nodded her head.

She slept peacefully that night, because she didn't fall asleep with the thoughts of names and faces swirling around her head for the first time in months. That was the first good thing that came from her plan and Gwen had a feeling that it wouldn't be the last.


	2. Chapter 2(fixed)

**Hey readers' thank you so much for the reviews, favorites and follows all I can say is YOU GUYS LIKE MY STORY! I am so happy that I quickly wrote down chapter 2 as fast as I could and I hope you enjoy this chapter as well.**

**I do not get money from this story and it's just for fun.**

**Warnings: Het, Slash, fem/merlin, gender bender, birth, character death, Arthur x Gwen, Arthur x Merlin.**

**Notice: I have decided to mark the parts of this story that has either lemon slash or het with a warning, so those who do not wish to read one or the other can just skip right pass it. I also will answer reviews at the bottom.**

The Will of Magic

_Gwen POV_

Gwen nervous came back the moment she opened her eyes that morning and looked to the right of her to see a beautiful dreaming Arthur; his innocent face reminded her that she will have to break his peace today. Gwen silently slide out of bed, got dressed and used her duties as an excuse to avoid her husband for that morning. It wasn't unusual for them to leave the other to their dreams when one of them was busy first thing in the morning.

The rest of the day didn't fare much better for Gwen, her anxiety was a stain on her mood, it was obvious and ugly. She wasn't out right mean to people but she was bluntly short with them. Fortunately they didn't try to console her about it and left her be; unfortunately it felt like her emotions are growing as the morning light turned into noon. After dismissing her maid for the day, Gwen waited in their chambers rubbing her hands together because they had gone cold and even when she warming them by the fire, which had already been set before she got there, didn't seem to help her nothing. She wanted something else to do besides thinking, if she did any more she knew would make herself crazy with worry. And she wasn't going to let her emotions make her back down or change her mind, which she had no doubts that is what she will do if not others are to make her rethink it, but she wasn't going to let fear of what others would think of her idea hold her back.

She heard the door suddenly bang open making her turn around to see her husband strolling in with a happy swag to his steps, she realized it much be from not having to go to, what Arthur called, a completely dull meeting where he would just watch a crowed of old men fight like 5 year olds over the cost of wares. He smiled when he saw her and gave her a warm kiss on the lips in greeting, asking mockingly, "My lovely queen, what is this important news you have to speak to me about to make me interrupt my taxes collectors."

Gwen took a second to figure out how to explain her plan; her father once told her it was best to start at the beginning of a story, so people don't get confused as you are telling it, so she decided that she should start at why she has brought him here. She took a breath to mentally steal herself, for what would surly became a fight between them, then she gently told him, "Arthur it's about having an heir."

He looked taken a back, not expending her to be the one to corner him about this and was at a loss for words, so she took the chance to hope in to stop him in his fight with her by continuing, "The kingdom needs a future leader, one that only another woman can provide."

She prepared herself for the worse as Arthur just stood there frozen in shock, she was hugely surprised that he didn't start yelling at her right away, but instead with a quiet voice asked "What?"

Gwen saw in his face as soon as he spoke the word he was shocked, at first silently then he look turned livid, once his mind had got around to what she was telling him, but he still don't yell at her instead in an irritated voice asked, "Are you approving of that desperate plan of me to have sex with a consort to provide a child?"

"Yes." She said simply and firmly, she wanted Arthur to know she didn't question her own actions; she wanted him to feel he had her support if he accepted her idea as well.

But when Arthur gave a slightly betrayed look at her answer, she felt a radiating guilt inside her heart for stabbing him like that with her words. The last thing she wanted was to cause him pain, but that didn't stop her from thinking about their duty, the war, the blood and the painful faces of her people if they didn't provide an heir. Arthur was wounded but still looking like he was ready to open his mouth at any minute to yell out in rage but before he did, he glazed into her eyes and whatever his saw in them make him hesitate. He must have saw her feelings displayed in her earthy eyes for he looked in them for a long moment, before his chest and shoulders suddenly straightened up. A thing he pick up when he realized that he needed to stop and think about the situation before saying anymore. But he was still a little angry so he stomped to his fur cover chair and stiffly sat down upon it, dipping his head down into his hands so he could message the sides of his head. He sighed in frustration has he sat there but slowly he slumped down his shoulder a little at a time in defeat until he was completely un-stiffing again.

Speaking quietly into his hands, just enough for her to make out what he was saying "I thought at one point I would get hunted down by my council on this topic, but I never saw my own wife doing it for them."

She walk over to the other side of the table so she could sit down with him, and when she was properly sitting in the chair he looked up at her to ask, "are you doing this because of what that adviser said at that meeting?"

It was true that her plan began to form then because of what the man had said and she would have to admit to the truth of that. If Arthur hadn't interrupted her as he quickly continuing on, before Gwen could even get the first word out of her mouth, "just because we are royalty doesn't mean we have to choose a path that is painful to us, because our sacrifice's wouldn't always make for a better kingdom." He looked into her eyes, trying to send the message across to her that he supported her in not offering up her own happiness for the people. For a moment her heart filled with happiness from her husband words for she knew he truly meant them, that her being happy was more important than some aspects of the kingdom. But the problem was would she be happy if he did as she asked, as unusual as the question sounded even in her own mind.

If he wanted to put her happiness first would it make her truly happy? Would she be relief that the future leadership of the kingdom was lifted off her shoulders? Would it make the kingdom secure again, so she could go back to being a loving queen? So she stop being this paranoid person she was now, worrying that someone would turn her beautiful home into a place of cruelty once again. No it wouldn't because the only way she can go back to that was if Arthur fix the problem that her barren state has cause, because then she could go back to being herself and to being happy again. If he wants to really put her happiness first he would do this for her.

She reached out to grab one of Arthur big hands, and looked into his blue hopeful eyes, so he could see her support for him. They mutually smiled at one other, Arthur probably thinking that she was backing down from this fight, but she gently told him, "Arthur it would make me happy to not spill anymore blood over this land. The advisor was right in what he said, about what is in store for Albion if you don't act."

Tears come into her eyes, as she imagined the horrible visions that been haunting her mind for weeks. But she was strong enough that she wouldn't let the tears fall down her cheeks, so she shakily continued, "I don't want that, I don't want to be the one that destroys the peace we worked so hard to create. Even if it means I have to share you with another, then I have accepted that and can live with it, but what I can't live with is our people's blood on my hands." She wanted to wipe the tears away for her eyes because they were burling everything together, but she feared doing so would bring more attention to her moment of weakness than she was already getting from her husband. Arthur rubbed her hands in silence to comforting her, as he could no longer meet her eyes and instead looked down at the table top. Sitting there in thought, like one of his stone statues which stoically guarded the castle. She let him sit there in quit so he has all the time he needs to think about he wants to do. So they sat together until the room turned dark from the setting sun, only then when the day had run out did he finally spoke.

"So you want me to have an affair with any woman?" Arthur asked in a neutral tone. It wasn't the most positive outcome, but he was listening to her and that is all she needed to get through to him. Because Arthur had the bad habit of not listening to other when people give him bad news, now she feared the next part of her plan would close off his ears to her for good but this was her only chance for his ears to be open to her plan at all.

As Gwen wiped her face, the tears had long since dried. For she was trying to stall, but there was nothing else for her to do and there wasn't an easy way to say it. So Gwen deciding to just tell him, though she knew what she said would be the hardest part for him to understand, "I've decided that if I have to share you with another then I want to pick her. So that I will be able to take comfort in giving you to a caring person and someone who will make the best possible mother for the heir to the throne."

His head jerked up suddenly and his anger returned in force, then he said, "So you just decided all this for me! Without a thought I don't want to have an affair or that I can't have an affair with a stranger!"

"Arthur it's not an affair if I give you permission to do it, it makes it a treaty that will save your kingdom and your people. You know our duty is to place them first!" She tried telling him. But he looked away from her and let go of her hand, cutting off any connect they had. Arthur looked like he was trying very hard to contain his anger so he wouldn't hurt her with it. So she left him alone to cool down for a little bit, for it was useless to talk to him when his mind was hurt and angry, besides she had pushed him enough. He now needed more time to think about what she had said and to let his emotions run out.

After running his hands through his golden hair a few times, tugging at it every couple of strokes. He wipe around in his chair to turned to her once more so he could look in her eyes again as simple ask her, "Why. .why do all this work just for me to bed another woman?"

"I've already told you Arthur. I love you, but when you marry me you made me into a queen. I want to be a good leader and the way to do that is to allow you to have an heir with the person I have chosen."

He leant his head back into the chair and covered his eyes with his hands, hiding away from the world for a moment, like a scared child using a blanket to hide away from the night. He suddenly slumped down more into his chair for a moment Arthur almost looked like he was going to slide right off it, still with his palms over his eyes, growing tired from trying to fight her when she was right and he knew she was doing it out of her care for others. So with nothing to fight with he calmly stated, "I know the goodness in your heart Gwen, it the thing that inspires you to do the right thing under any situation and it's why I fell in love with you. But I don't think I could go through with it, having to have a child with a stranger." Arthur shook his head at his own unpleasant words.

"I.. aah.. picked someone we both know very well," she amended hesitantly. Gwen knew how he going react to what she was about to say, it would go down about as well as somebody being sentence to stand in the stocks on burning hot day. Arthur look at her in confusion, he don't ask her to elaborate but waited for her to give the answer. Sitting herself up straight, a mental trick she learned to used to steeling herself against anything, it almost made her feel like she had put on armor and it would also help to show him she was serious . She revealed the answer as simply "Merlin."

The confusion on Arthur face slowly turned into the expression that he used when he he thought someone was not mental stable or hadn't had enough sleep. Arthur asked, "Is there another Merlin? Because the only one I know of doesn't have the parts to make a child with other man."

"If he used his magic to turn himself into a woman, he could," she explained.

At first Arthur didn't fully realize what she was suggesting with him and Merlin, his face was blank for a while but she saw a light of realization come into his eyes then shock his system in to acting, making him knocking over his chair has he suddenly stand up on his feet, yelling out with the most angry tone he had used since they started talking, "so you are going forced Merlin into carry my child!" His yelled growing louder with each word that he spoke, by the time he was at the end anyone would have feared that the guards would think they were in danger and having them rush in doing the opposite of helping.

She wasn't thinking about that because when Arthur said that she wanted to yell out in anger at him. Arthur might be both her husband and her best friend. But she was still Merlin friend and she would never willing want to hurt her friend, having Arthur say that to her made the burn of that hurt damage twice as much inside of her. Making her voice show it in a hurtful angry tone when she replied. "I would never force Merlin to do anything that was against his consent. My plan was to ask him if he could be a part of this, if he refuse then that it. But he is my only choice for this because he is our best opportunity to provide a great leader to the kingdom."

Arthur open his mouth to argue against her, but she stopped him by angrily listing the benefits she had thought of earlier, "He is the kindest friend you have, the bravest comrade who has always fight beside you, our must loyalist person in the court and wise beyond his years. All splendid traits that could make a passionate leader. That not all there also his benefits as well as in his passing down his magic, which would help put the magical community be at ease in accepting the change of power when the heir takes over, now you tell me what druid would not follow the child of Emrys. The child could also be a dragon lord if it's a boy, so Merlin wouldn't have to be the last one of his kind. And do you have any doubts that Merlin wouldn't raise your child properly?"

He blinked at the sudden question at the end of her speech and looked off to the side not wanting to give his answer, the one she knew is the same as hers. So she decided she wasn't going to let him deny the truth.

"Because I have no doubt that Merlin would raise a great future king or queen!" she said firmly. Relief washing through her body from finally speaking all the words that were contained inside of her, it was as if her mind was a piece of cloth that had once been dirty with festering words that had been finally scrubbed clean white again. Although she still feared his anger would destroy her plan, it didn't over power how her body felt at that moment. Whatever results came from her actions, she had done her best for the future of the kingdom and she could feel proud of that.

"Why Merlin?" he asked in a quiet and shaky voice. He was still taken aback by his earlier emotions of rage for Arthur knew he was losing this fight. But he was confused, even though she just explained why it had to be his best friend and questioning her again wouldn't change the outcome of the words. He then looked up at her to see her face, because she didn't give him an answer right away. Understanding the problem he asked again, but with now he reworded the question, "We have an entire country to look through, Merlin isn't the only one who has magic and also great personality. Merlin can easily pass down the dragon lord powers to his own son, one that is not from me, when he marries someday. And he's not the only one who is uncertainly loyal to us, so why does it have to be HIM?!"

She folded her hands together and gently explained, "Because you and I don't want to bring a baby into this world with someone you don't really know, nor know what intentions they may have for your child. It's disturbing to think about, let alone do. So who could we truly feel more comfortable with, other than with the man who is always by your side looking out for you."

Arthur had many changing emotions flicker on his face fear, anger and understand were some of the few he felt. Still standing he turned his back to her, before he suddenly left through the door almost running out of their chambers. She don't try to stop him she knew he must be feeling overwhelmed by all that she had said to him today and she don't what to push him anymore. She said all she could, the next part would have to be decided by Arthur and all she could do now was wait for his answer to come. Beside she knew where he was going anyway, to the only other person that was not his wife that he felt safe with to fully be himself and could get sound advice from.

But she wondered how Merlin would take it coming from Arthur instead of her.

_Arthur POV_

Arthur bristly walked down the hallways of the castle, not knowing where he was headed but feeling he had to go somewhere else so he could clear the mess that his wife as make in his head. He walk, avoiding the hallways where people frequency the most, until he ended up in a part of the castle that had almost no servants in it. He stop at the only door in the hallway before he realized it was Merlin chamber door he was standing in front of. He should have realized as soon as he hit the empty halls, for even though Merlin now had a title he still believed that you should be the one to take care for your own things. Which he did, even though he mostly cheated by using his magic to get the job done. While it relief the servants of some of their chores it also left them without reason to come visit his rooms, unless they needed his service or was delivering something to him.Arthur debated if he should go in or not, Merlin was usually in his chambers on most afternoons doing his work, so he don't have to worry about if anyone was going to answer his knocks. Taking away one of his worries.

On one hand he felt conflicted on what Gwen's had planned for him that he needed to talk about it with his best friend, where he could feel relaxed and safe so he could say the words that where building in him. But on the other hand he felt overwhelmed when he thought of talking about procreating with Merlin, he didn't even want to think about what Merlin reaction would be.

But maybe he don't have to talk about that part of it, he could just say Gwen was planning to give Arthur to a consort so they could bring a child into the world together. That sounded like a better plan to Arthur than starting another argument today with somebody that doesn't understand Gwen plan.

Steeling his nerves Arthur quickly opened the door and went inside to see Merlin was right where Arthur knew he would be, at his desk working at some paperwork that he had put off till the end of the day. Merlin looked up at the sound of door closing and notice the tensioned in Arthur's face made him put away his quill back into its holder. Then Arthur went to a medium size table in the center of the room, the one that was half covered in all kinds magical books, meaning Arthur could only sat down in one of the blue chairs that was near the clear side of the wooden surface. Meanwhile Merlin walked over to one his cupboards and looked through it searching for the item they both needed for this talk. While he waited for Merlin to finish his search Arthur mindless looked around.

Merlin's chambers hadn't changed much since the last time he ventured into them, just a few more magical items here and there, with small mountains of paper stacked on every flat surface. It almost looked like Gaius's old physician chambers but the place was cleaner, if a little bit over cramped with stuff. There were also three doors leading to rooms each with different propose in mind. One open to Merlin personal bed chambers. The second going to what Merlin called his indoor garden, a room where the walls were made mostly of clear sparkly glass so that sunlight could come through to the magical rare plants Merlin was growing, making it no longer necessary to go on deathly missions like before to gather the healing herbs needed to treat wounds or make potions. With Merlin reassured Arthur when he built his magical garden on the side of the castle that his spell would made the glass as unbreakable as Arthur's stone walls. Then finally there was a third door to an antechamber that was now being used by Merlin as a storage room for his more unused magical things or research.

Merlin suddenly sounded a 'ah' as he found what he was looking for, he brought out two wooden cups and a brown wine skin. He came over to the half covered book table to sit down on the chair next to Arthur and poured a healthy amount of some kind of red wine into each cup. Arthur drained his wine in one gulp, barely tasting the sour grape flavor of the drink and watched Merlin bring his own cup up to his lips but barely seeing any of it gone when he set it back down.

"Better?" Merlin asked, Arthur shrugged his shoulders because he was just about fine enough to speak, but that was as far as the drinks influence went. Arthur felt like a rope that had be knotted too tight until it became too hard to untangle himself completely again. But Merlin took that as enough to continue calmly asking, "What's the problem Arthur? The minute you walked in your face looked like the time you got knocked off your horse by one of your knights when you were jousting."

Arthur sighed, he didn't doubt that he looked like he had been hit with something unbelievable, no doubt felt as if he had. He gestured towards the wine skin to get another shot of the relaxing nectar and Merlin compiled with the silence demand, but gave him a lot less then the first time. Arthur drunk down the measly offering and hoarsely stated, "Gwen has asked me to bed another, so that the kingdom can have an heir."

Merlin just sat there with a blank look on his face. Arthur nodded his head in agreement on seeing Merlin's reaction and said, "I felt the same!"

Still quite shocked from Arthur's statement Merlin just muttered what came into his head, "She must be very worried about the security of the kingdom then."

"Merlin there's always a threat to the kingdom, having an heir wouldn't change that and she knows it. So why could she want me to do this?" he questioned angrily. Arthur felt like he needed more wine and sent a look to the wine skin to indicate to Merlin that he need more of the soothing drink but instead Merlin grab the cups and bag to put them on his far side, keeping it as far out of Arthur's reach as he could.

Merlin then put a comforting hand on Arthur's shoulder and turned him, making Arthur look into his sky blue eyes to see his sincerity of his message, when he said, "It's because she loves you and Albion, love makes us want to do everything we can for our precious ones, even when it means it will hurt them. And sometimes that is the only way to do the right thing for them."

Arthur knows that Gwen was just trying to do her best by him, but he wishes sometimes that their love wasn't complicated by also having to take care of an entire kingdom as well. He refused to be like his father, thinking that doing your duty took precedence over having your own personal happiness and that having both was an impossible achievement. The irony being, years ago he had proved his father wrong in selecting to rule Albion fairly and choosing to freely love those closest to him, but then because of that choice both of the people he was most proud of seemed to agree that he needed to have an affair, just like his father did but this time for the betterment of everyone. But Arthur wasn't sure if it was really the right way or even the only way to go about it. Now he saw the reasoning because what Gwen had said was logically true. But his duty and his emotions were in conflict with each other, making him confused on what path his should walk for his people and himself.

"What do I do Merlin?" Arthur quietly asked the one question that would change his world and Merlin. One that hopefully he will have the answer that Arthur could not grasp for himself.

"You need to do what you think is right by you Arthur, because others may be right in suggesting it but it is you who will have to live with your actions. If you don't think about it carefully you may come to regret it and no one should bring a child in this world hating their life." Merlin advised gently.

This moment felt familiar, like the time he asked Merlin if he should marry someone without love. Just like that time Arthur felt a sense of wisdom and a deep care for his wellbeing flow of Merlin words. He knew that whatever everyone else had already decided, Merlin would asked him to consider his own feelings. Arthur then wondered if this is what Gwen saw in Merlin when she choose him to carry his child, because if it was he was starting to see it too. It wasn't like Arthur wasn't a little disturbed at the thought of having to do something as intimate as bedding Merlin and all that comes with it, as well as also having Gwen know about it. But his mind was starting to become clearer to his wife plan. But now the question was could he live with having a child that was not a part of his wife's and did he even want a child? Arthur never really thought about a child for his future, he just assumed one would come along in time during his marriage.

Arthur could image a toddler staring up at him with its blue eyes through a mop of black hair. He image it crying late into the night, are when it learns to move around when its curious nature urges it to explore everything. Or having to cope with nappies and fluids that drain from its small body as it grew, that a baby will do and more. But he also thought of the emotion he would feel when his child called him daddy from the first time, of how proud he would be when he took his first steps to try to walk into Arthur's arms. The emotions he would later in the years feel teaching his heir how to fight and conquer its enemy's, the enjoy of the hunting trips they would share together. But would these experiences out weight the guilt he would feel loving a child without his wife?

Then there if he goes with Gwen's plan would he be a good parent because of his child or would he be like his own father? His father who was always distancing himself from his son, with obstacles like making him think emotions like love showed weakness and only showing his affecting for Arthur when he couldn't really see it. But deep down Arthur knew he wasn't his father, he had surely proved that with all that his done and change in over the years of his reign. So why would he follow the example of Uther in parenthood if he didn't with the other things his father tried to teach him? He wouldn't, not with his own offspring or any other child. Arthur knew raising a child would be hard, but he thought he may enjoy caring for a smaller him or Merlin.

So he decided that the joys of having one small being outweighed the unpleasant things children did. Getting him over the weirder problem of bedding his best friend. Then help remind him that he will get over his guilt and the fact his wife planned this whole thing, one day. But this sudden urge to be a father made it cleared in his mind that this wasn't a bad idea after all, especially with the thought of Merlin by his side to help him with it. For he knew Merlin would be a good parent, he knew that from all the years of Merlin always standing by his side, teaching him how to be a great king and a better person, making him have an understanding of the common people. The same man who helped him with all kinds of problems and stood beside him through all dangers even when he hurt Merlin, he was still there by him trying to support him through it all.

He wanted that for his child as well, someone to show it how to take the reins of the kingdom in its own hands without fear. That he will do right thing by Albion but still can gain his own happiness, all the things Uther had been disinterested in show Arthur. As well as the tutors, knights and nobles Uther had appointed or approved of were too scared in crossing the line with the prince to teach him either.

Gwen's was right in her plans, but now how would Merlin take it? He wasn't going to forced Merlin in any way into this. So if he refused Arthur he has no idea really what he do then. He didn't want to think about the other solutions his council or Gwen would come up with if he refused.

Arthur looked at Merlin then, who still had a comforting hand on his shoulder. Merlin must have of seen something change in Arthur's eyes because he leaned back on his chair and asked "Do you still need to talk about it Arthur?"

Arthur simply nodded his head. He did needed to talk about the full plan with Merlin, but a small fearful side of Arthur didn't know how to begin or if he even want to speak at all. Because Merlin as done many things for them in the past, but this would be beyond any of the weird things he had ever done before. Arthur decided that he just needed do it, just to take that fear inside of him and push it down in a dark corner where it wouldn't be seen, like he done all those other times it as had showed it head. Because there was no tactful or easy way to say this to Merlin. So Arthur took a deep breath and said, "Gwen has chosen the consort that she wants to bare the child."

"That usual," Merlin said with a slightly confused face and looked like he was going to say more but Arthur cut him off, wanted to get it all out quickly. "Gwen just wanted to find the perfect person to conceive a great heir for the kingdom and as well as get someone to be a good parent alongside me. But unfortunately her choice in choosing was not the uncanny part about it, but it was who she picked." Arthur said reluctantly.

"Who?" Merlin asked innocently, Arthur turned his chair to fully face Merlin so when he told him Merlin would see how serious he was and realize this was not a sick joke being played on him. If Arthur heard this plan from anyone else but Gwen, he would think the same way. Their group of close friends were known to play tricks on one another for time to time, but there can't be any games now. So with a firm but as gentle tone as he could manage Arthur said, "It's you."

Merlin didn't react to what Arthur had just said, he just sat there in the same position as time flowed by. It was if the words were taking their time to reach his mind. Lasting for several minutes until Arthur started to worry that his words had instead broken something inside Merlin. But then Merlin said in an unemotional voice, with still no change in his expression "But I'm a man."

"Yes, but you can fix that using your magic" Arthur answered simply.

Even then Merlin didn't move. Arthur thought the problem was that Merlin realizes that he could fix their problem with magic, after all his magic was a very big part of him, but the think of him doing the things they were asking him just couldn't be accept inside him. This was why Arthur was so worried about Gwen forcing Merlin to go along with her idea. Because Arthur would have to do something against his morals and with his best friend at that, but he wouldn't have to turn himself in a foreign female body nor carry a baby within that body and then go through the pains of labor to give it life. Things Merlin probably thought he would never have to experience because of his gender. It was painfully obvious that there would be more for Merlin to take on and accept than on Arthur's side, none of which was going to be easy for the warlock to do.

"You don't have to choose to do it Merlin and you'll of course have all the time you need to come to a decision." Arthur tried to reassure Merlin but it didn't awaking him from his stoic state. So Arthur tried thinking of other method to wake him, like the facts Gwen told him on earlier, then maybe he'd could get a response out of him.

"You can pass on your dragon lord powers or even your magic and we can teach the child how to be a great ruler so there wouldn't be any need to worry about the security of the kingdom anymore." Arthur stated but ended up miserably fumblingly the words around just trying to get Merlin the motive to move again.

There was nothing, not even a blink of the eye. Arthur grow desperate to get some idea about where Merlin's thoughts were in all this, so he thought maybe if Arthur roughly shook him it would be like awaking him from a deep sleep. But Arthur barely touched Merlin on one of his thin shoulders before Merlin suddenly flinched back from him, as if his fingers were going to violated him somehow and he stared at him with wide eyes waiting for Arthur next move. Arthur held his hands up, like he was calm a spooked horse that would kick him if he got reckless. Then saying in a slow gentle voice, "Merlin you don't have to do it if you don't want to, we're just asking you to think about it for a while, ok?"

It didn't work as well as Arthur hoped in settling Merlin down, he wasn't looking so scared anymore, but there was defiantly a sense of panic about him, not at directed at Arthur but from something else that was making him start to massage his head in pain as he stared somewhere off to the side. "So you going along with her plan then." Merlin spoke anxiously.

"Mer. ." Arthur began to say but Merlin stopped him by asking hoarsely, "Can you leave, please?"

Arthur felt guilty for putting his friend in this position, for all their years together and all the danger they faced Merlin had never asked him to leave before, so for him to do so now must mean he truly needed to be alone. Arthur didn't fight him or argue, he simply just left, hoping by tomorrow he wouldn't regret what he had done.

_**Loulou2a:**_ Thank you for thinking my story is interesting. I am a fan of both of Merlin genders, so I hoped that both sides would come to like this story so thanks for being the first to admit to checking it out. I love their relationship too so I wanted a story to focus more on that then the gender on a character, even thaw it is important too, so I chose to write one. Now you have his reaction I hoped you liked it, but you'll have to keep reading of you want Merlin response.

_**LadyFromPoland:**_ Thank you for saying my ideas is great and hope you enjoy the second chapter just as must as the first.

_**Luke Knight:**_ Poor king Arthur didn't know what was coming to him!

_**Wilhelm Wigworthy: **_Thank you for reviewing and it really makes my day that someone thinks my story style is unique.

_**kweandee:**_ Thank you!

_**dreamerlc:**_Thank you for liking my story and your wise came true, hope you enjoy this better.

_**ProcastinationIsMyCrime:**_ I understand a spelling mistake can throw you off your reading but now I have a beta so hope you enjoy the story a little better.


	3. Chapter 3(fixed)

**Yeah readers. I am so sorry that it take so long to get this chapter out, my computer been having some problems that I had to get fix, so I couldn't write and hopefully the next chapter wouldn't take so long to get out but thanks for all you guys comments, favorites, follows. Can't wait to see how you reaction this chapter. Now some of you guys has pointed out to me that I have some spelling problems and I am sorry for those. I don't have a beta, so I trying my best to edits this myself and if you see me make any mistake don't hesitate to tell me, just don't be rude about it and I will listen. Hope you enjoy.**

**I don't get money from this story, it's only for fun.**

**Warnings: Het, slash, birth, character death, Merthur, Arthur x Gwen, fem/Merlin, gender bender.**

The Will of Magic

_Merlin POV_

Of all the things he has done and sacrificed for the sake of Arthur while trying and to bring about the golden age of Alboin, . nNever before hads he be asked to give something so personal as his own future flashflash and blood. S so that it could Arthur could be safeprompt on the throne.

From the moment he stepped on the soil of Camelot's soil he has done what the great dragon, destiny and even his friends has asked of him, without much question nor fight. Even when his only reward was being seen as 'just the servant' an idiot of no importance to anyone around him. Forced to fulfill a destiny while still trying to keep who he was intact.

He was so use to doing everything in his power, that he couldjust so that the right pathway to peace would be revealed., Bbut this wouldn't be only about making other peoples life better, it will also be about how this wouldill affect his live.

Merlin didn't know if he should blameed this on destiny, or on his bad luck and inability to of not staying out of trouble, but this surly will became a problem. Because even ifas magic hads been accepted back, that wouldn't mean that people wouldn't look at his childkid as anif it is unnatural being, that shouldn't have be born., Aa point of view from others that wouldill bring down trouble down on for the heir for its whole life.

Merlin wasn't sure he could put a child through a should trauma like that, especial his own child. But if it was destiny that was making this happen, then did he even have a choice in what going to happen?

To Merlin eEverything seemedrun tooo run too smoothly together ion connecting him and Arthur in this situation, that Merlin wondered if he was is fated to walk down this path that he would bewas forced to walk down this path until it was on wasn't complete finish yet. For n. Merlin was ow in days Merlin alwaysalway worriess panicked about their future, because t because their destiny was said that they would bring about Albion golden years, and that Arthur will die by Mordred hand because of it. But hHis friend hadn'tdidn't meet his death and theis country still hads its golden years. So Merlin wondered how much is fate was reallystill playing with them, and whatwill theyre be punished will be giving to them for changing the end of their destiny, after all he has suffered by the hand of fate for disobeying its words before.

Merlin didn'toesn't know how to get the answers to that, all he did know was that Gwen was right in that, the kingdom needed an heir. Logically he thoughtinking the plan was one that both Camelot and Merlin could benefit from. That's if, if Merlin was selfish enough tohat he would bring a child into this world for the sake of politics alone. Because politics was the reason why that Gwen, Arthur and Albiooin wanted to have an heir, not because they wanted a cute little person to love in their lives. Now Merlin lovikeds babies, to not argue to have to large family of them, but this sounded too much like a chess move , in on the game of power they all played, rather thenthan a person wantingliking to become a parent.

All this conflict between his reasonreasonsing, his logical and emotion senses was making him spinning question around in circles his mind. What should he do? What could he do? What is the right choice? Merlin felt like he couldn't settleget through a singlecomplete thought before something showed up to argued againstcontrast it and then leaving him with no answer. Merlin decided he neededs a break, he felt like he wasould going to gohis brain was going to make itself insane with all this this jumbledmpy thoughtsinking and emotional trauma clouding inside him.

Merlin stood up and headed to his indoor garden, a place that wasn't only functional throughfor growing herbs, but was a room that he could go into to just think and relax,es when he didn't what to see anybody., but just the calmnessest andof quietness of nature, it just seemed to relaxuncoil Merlin. But when he opened the door his mind was still going overprocessing his the questions and , jumpinged toonto how a child would love playing around the different plants that grow there almost like a jungle like. What, with all the vegetation being that those green lives forms that grow here comingcaome from all over the different parts of the country and him planting. t so tThemy greow a bit disunorganized. With ,as and Merlin didn't exclude trees or bushes that Merlin didn't exclude because of theirthat had great magical properties toin for his collectionng, makingso the place sorely looked very more wild and unmanaged.

He turned back aaround andto escaped from his chambers, and going through the castle hallways , that were mostly unused, to go enteringout into the town. Maybe by doing some shopping or talking to people that weren't part of the castleouncil maybe would be enough of a distraction for him to get a moment offor his mind to rest from his thoughts.

Merlin He goes bywent to his favorite staull, a magic book shop, whose owner's name was Adam, a middle age man with a friendly personality and whose body had grown as tall as two men., Tthey had gotten to known one each another very well over the years, partly because Adam always kepteps his shop filled with the newest of books, and Merlin was always looking forwent there to buy up the next magical discovery. GThat routine hads givingenave them many thrilling conversions, on the mutual topics that were their of mutual interest, and ofof spells which lead them to a make shiftlyshiftily become friendship. Leaving quit the happy place for Merlin to pay from. they had manyat was good for debates and Merlin found it a happy place to buy from.

Findounding the place he was looking for Merlin stood outsidelookeds up at the one room fine wooden one room building with it's one room. Full with mostly of with clean selves of books, staocked neatly stacked together by Adam who categorizeding them by their content. Then there was his in what matter is writing inside them There was and a long table resting in the back of the room where Adam long bodys satsaits watching his thingsstuff. Merlin enteredHe goes into the nice book shop, and lookeds through all the new wares while running his fingers along the spines of the older books as he pass them. , Tto find an interesting novel on life spells, and then taking the novel in hand, to go to Adam wentgoes to have a short talk while paying him is coinsith Adam.

It sounded pleasant looking on the outside, but allAll the time Merlin was thereThrough the whole trip he was reminded that thehis choice of parenthood did not only affect him, but knowing that even this books owner will be touch by this choice in some way. C, causingweaving new questions to come into his already confused brain., Oonly due toby Merlin's ability toof hideing his emotions from plain view was he able to keep composed throughout the visit. But the questions did wouldn't leavedisappear from hism thoughts once their talk was done and Merlin had left the stall.

What would others think about this? He looked at the book he had just bought, wondering if it wWould ithis book help him in some way? Is Adam as worriedy about the kingdoms future as Gwen is? And Tthese thoughtsis continued with everyone he met until he ended up just walking pass people with his eyes down to the dirt, untill he saw the view of people's feet decrease until he saw to none and the stone ground turn into green bright grass., Tthere was only one place Merlin could think of that was in walking distancet that had very few people in it, that was the forest.

Merlin looked up, ready to feeling his body relaxgo limp from the clean fresh breeze that floweding around him, or was it the simply quietnessest of the place that couldwas never be fully achieved when you livedfe in athe castle that calmed him down. Oor perhaps it was just the beauty of the living green forest thatwould did itcalmed his nervesous. Either way the relaxing moment was ruin when he fully He looked up to for a But instead the moment and he looked up he spotted a deer that stoodwas alertly staring at him completelyfully alert fromfrom 20 feet away from where he himself stood., heHe thought suddenly thought that if Arthur wereas here he would have loved to hunted thateat deer, than. thatThis leading him to wonder if Arthur's child would be as great a hunter as hisits father is, and Merlin couldhe can just imagininge how proudideful of that moment Arthur would be is it was so.

There went Merlin chance That thought ruined any chance of Merlin had to calm down, and so defeatednded he sat down in the dirt where he had been standing before, to andood putting his head in his hands trying to think of a way to escape all this., Hso his mind wantedould be free for a little bit, because he knew he wouldn't be able to think straight otherwise was.

There had to be a place for Merlin that didndidn'toesn't remind him of Gwen's idea at every turnsite, it obviously couldn't be Camelot anymore, but there wasn't a lot of other choices to be had, to have because there wereas memories all over Albiooin from either the battles they had foughting or the alliancesyi they had created, whichmadeng covering almost with every piece of land that made up of this country. No, Merlin would just have to settle with searchingsettle with search for an area where he could feel safe, while getting him far away from the distended from this situation and where he could get some muchost need advice.

He would normally go to think of Gaius first, because he was so wise in so manymultiple things, but he was also too connected to Arthur. Now Gaius thought of Merlin as his adopted son but he had also looked after Arthur since he had been born and. Merlinand he don't want advice that would beas be inflection from affected by the needs of the king orand his kingdom, he was already getting enough of that from the others. Besides Gaius lived too close to the castle, and Merlin wanted to be at least outside of the city limits in order to really relax.

Then he thoughtinks of his mother, she still liveds in the same place where Merlin was born, just not in the same home, because when Merlin was givening the title court sorcerer one of the first things he changed beside laws on magic, was he rebuiltrebuilding of rebuilding Hunith's home so she cwould live out a more comfortableer life. Then wWhen the druids heardears got wind of who his mother wasis many resettled themselves in his old village, so that they could be as close to their Emrysbry without living with in the city., evenEven with him in Camelot a lot of druids still liked to livfe out their days closer to nature, thaen have the conveniencet of the capital.

When the bane on magic was lifteddestroyed the people whose children had the gift of magic would send them or live with the druids, so that they could be shown how to control their talentsmselves. TSo when he numbers of parents who couldn'tan't handle their children's magical outbursts grew to be too overwhelming for the and when the druids to house where soon overwhelmedover packed, then Merlin's mother decided to use all her extra space and make a sort of temporary shelter for magically gifted baring children.

It wasn't the most ideal place to be to thinking figuring things out, being, what with how the druids wouldwould love there to be magic flowing through the royal line, and to have Emrysmbry offspring in one go. Also , plus Merlin feared that the children would remind him of the offer,. bBut maybe helping out with their care for them would solve the problem of distancing himself from thise situation.

Surprisingly his friends hadn't come back to his birthorn place since thehat one time whenthat they went to go save it from the bandits, so there wasn't a lot of memories of the group resting there. Then there the reason he thought of the village in the first place, which wasSoand Merlin gettingcouldan easily get sound and unbiased advice from his mother.

It would be better than staying there than itting there in Camelot. So in the dirt.

theTheA choice made, Merlin stood up and quickly walked back to the castle to packet for his muchst needed trip.

Now hHe madke sure to packet discretely, as so no one would accidently alarmed the royals so they could stop him.

PSo he packinged enough supplies for thea two day trip. Merlin then wrote down instructionsing for his own advisers, telling that themy to must take care of the kingdom, as he was going to be absentce in an unknown amount of days. He then grabs edgrabbeda a small chest from it resting place underbesides his desk and took from itpulls threesomeout from it palm sizeds stone birds statues. Placing them gently on the desk top, then putting a quick spell on the little figures. To have them they suddenly each started to moveing, rotating their limps around and flapping their now graywhite wings in experiment. After testing out their joints, then they fluttered out the window that Merlin had early opened for them. This was a spell that his research group discovered all ago made, so that letters could be send safely with this the massagers birds who scould magical sense danger and where design to avoid dangers that which would might stop could get in the way of athe letter froms getting to thereitstheiits destinationlocation. It was better than any bird who could do the same, because, they can could and the be instruinctedinstructed to fly into the direct hand of theany person that the letter was writtensigned to, better than any normal bird massager Merlin knew ofthought.

So Merlin chose to use this measure whenwas contactcontactinging his three main advisers that wereare the heads of his magical council. Tthe first group being the doingbeing researcher, as after Uther had ordered the burning of all the books related to of the old religion there was little written knowledge left after his purge. Merlin feltound it important to restore the information that had been destroyed for this new generating and also wanted making new spells to be found so that they could find ways to improve the kingdom. Then there his was his cCcaster patrolS, they being guards and knights who wereare trained in spells, so their forces could that have at least oneand that will at least sent one casterr wouldto go with every group to be able to defend against magic or heal wounds of guards that were patrolling the kingdom to as protecting the welling being of Albion. AsAas well as having them hunting down the Albion magical criminlascriminalsmagical wanted. , so if they couldir defending against a magic user, giving each patrol the necessary skills to stand against such people then they would have someone that could stand against that. And finally the investigation advisors, people who used their powers to findound out the truthe of a situation rather thaen going onff the word of anyonea person..

Merlin feltel bad for a moment, giving themof ordering more responsiblityresponsibilityy then they needed toon them but theen he thought of the choice he was being asked to make and how that would change his Merlin life. AndAand how it would made a change in the game of power the kingdoms fururefuture for magic. They would have to understand his absence and for he need to make the right choice in this., he thought they would understand his absence.

Now withWhen eEverything ready to go he finally prepared his method of travel. So Merlin wentgoes to his garden to pick the necessary herbs., Joan, who had been raised by the a druids, raise girl, who is his assistant would take care of thehis garden with his absent, as she has always done for him in the past. when he was absentSo he went straight toce, tearing aring out acacia, a puffy yellow flower, from the branch of its tree. Then, three leafs from the stems of balm of gilead and then, a whole stem of basil, resting right next to it. andH he then returneds to his fire pit to throw them in a small iron pot with a splash of water to boil down the green plants.

Making theAs the room filled with the smells of strange herbs mixing together to ache at the nose. He left it trusting the pot will boil the plants into a paste, he wentgoes over to his packed itemsstuff and commanded his magic to decrease the size of the bags until they were no smaller than the pbalm of his hand. Then taking a strong thread and weaving it through the handles of the bags to then then tied it off in to make a loop, once he was done he left his small projectaving it on the top of the table.

Checking his pot tohe could seesees that the water had s turned into a misty green color from absorbing the plants like he wanted, taking a spoon his pokeds at the ingredients bubblinge in the iron black pot to check then seeing that they had becomeve softened enough that he could easily he maushed up the parts of the plants that didn't boil them into a chucky paste and then adds dark green a sea weed called bladderwrack to be boil in with the paste for a while longer. With that going he stepts away from the pot again to and grabgrabeds some more dry ingredients from his cupboard that sat next to his fireplace. Then t Taking a jar of saffron and dried yucca flowers petals, from yucca to put them into a mortar to grind them into fine grainy powder with histhe pestle. Once done he dusted a handful ofthe powder into the potion and then the finally step is to pickeds out the now made useless bladderwrack sea weed from the black pot with a spoon. Merlin tookakes a medium sizeds vial from out of one of his cupboards and pouredspills the now dirty green potion into the container adding a lit bit of water so that it would go down easier.

It wasn't in the vial for long because he only needed the container to measure out the right portion forHis potion completed Merlin to shallowedswallow it down and then quickly saidy the words that would begin his transformationing, a a similarto the spell he may mightay have to do in the future. But he ignored that and let hisHis whole body rebirth itself, letting brown and white feathers randomly grow where they will, except for his back which only sprang brown ones. Eeven his clothes started to vanish away so the feathers can grow and helpingspringing white and brown feathers randomly, except for his back which just grow brown ones, hise bones be able shrink into a smaller lighter shapes. His lips yellowed then spread out into a point and then harded so he would be ableto tear his meal into pieces, his feet greow thin and long with sharped claws at the tip so heend can to catch his prey. His arms turn into wings and he moved them around like his statues did earlier did to get usedthe handle toon using them.

He has made himself into a Merlin hawk one of his most favorite forms to takebirds and, for obvious reasons, the body he uses most to take when he has to travel long distancesdistances alone. Merlin founds that birds can fly faster distances, then a horse could run without needing ed to stopping for days on end. He had tested this out when And this form had helpedsaved him a few times when his presence was dangerously needed urgently in another areas of Albion and horse wouldn't be fast enough. So without delay

Merlin hoppeds over to his bags and easily slides through the circle of tread that he made, so he could carrying his stuff along his chest and flyewops out the open window which he had left unlocked earlier. He bBeating his wings hard to get himself higher up into the blue sky, , he foundinginds that patch of ofairthermals air that will let himyou glade on for days without needed much effort from himassistants. With the windair rushing through his feathers and pushing up on his wings to keep him afloat, Merlin set himself of on theto the path toforfor his second home.

Two days later

Once Merlinhe finally settles down uponon the soil of his home village, he finally felt some sense of relief from, of just being back atto his childhood home. Luckily for him he had figured out a way to return back to his original body without having to useing another potion, by just using raw magic and and mentally focusinges on what he looked like to returning to his old self. But first he pulls the string which heldith his bags off of him, usingwith his yellow beak to snap the thread, because they wouldn't grow along with thehis body size of his body. THe then closeeclosesds his black round eyeballss, mentally viewed himself with snow white skin, skinny limbs, night black hair and, as a young male with his clothes on,. Then he and he starteds to feel his magic changinged his form to fit the picture in his mind.

When he looked down at his body he found it to be as he wantedaccurately the same and he pickeds up the mini bags. Untangling the tread keeping them together to and released the bags on to the pbalm of his hand, then he magically wishhedlls them back to their normal sizes. They grow like plants to the sun and he hold them in his palm until they grow big enough that he could grab their ties, then once bloom into their true sizesThen he lifteds them overon his shoulders.

Even with him flying for two days, he still managed to get has getting here fast enough to findwhere there is still just an enough of a slit of sunlight in the sky to see around thethe area.

Spotting the house he was looking for he walkeds over to what is now the biggest wooden home in Ealdor, and knockeds firmly on the door. His mother She was usually at home by this time, been that it was so late but as as Hunith's house was a place full with contented children, that needed to be taking care of and sometimes Merlin's visit would start with him standing outside the doorway for thea longest period of time. Only bbbecause she was just too busy with the kids or just don't hear his knocking, to let him know it was ok for him to come inside.

But that seem like it wasn't going to be the case same for this time because he heard the door loudly unlock for him, and there appeared his mother's head, peeking out to see who it was on the other side. Hunith squinted into the darknessat the lack of light to seeand probably barely saw his face. But oOand once she realizeds who it was she herded him into her arms toand hugged to give him with aa nice lovingly embrassembarrasssqueezes as they greeted one anothertheir greeting.

As Merlin held on to her tightly he hearedheards the sudden sound of giggling and he looked beyond his mother's shoulder to the youngsterslings standing on the staircase excitedly waving at him excitedly from over his mother frame . They didn't rush at him as they use to do in a happy wave of bubbly excited children who triedying to talk over each other in their own joys of seeing him., Bbecause Hunith had taught the kids it was rude to interrupt someone who was in the middle of a greetinggreeting someone else. Being like a second mother to them the childrenkids followed what his mother had taught themhad to say very much like their own parents..

She pulled him back to saying, "you usually don't come in to visit this late, it's nearly the time to put the kids to sleep." Merlin knewows how getting every child upstairs and tuckedg into bed was like planning a tactfully battle plan. "I'll help you then.", " Merlin saidtated helpfully.

Merlin expected to feel that the last thing he would want iswas to be is around kids, after what Arthur has asked of him, but has he looked into their innocent faces has theythat arewas aso happy to see himthe thatm as heso happy to see him as they always wasere and he didn't think about Arthur. Iinstead his mind was filled with his own happiness of seeing them all once again as well.

Hunith smiled at him, leading him into the house where the children finally were clear of his mother greeting that they raced at him for their own hugs and hellos. Merlin tried to greeted each of themone with one of their own, but with their body tightly trying to get in front of the other so they could have his focus, that must of the time he could only hugs, rubbeds on their heads and even a few tickleds a few on theirsome bellies.

But after that it was a blur of activitye as they went up stair totheyof them putting the youngsterslings to bed, making sure the every kid hads cleaned their teeth and that they were comfortable with toys, blankets or drinks of water for their thirsty throats.

With all the little ones settle in their beds, he and his mother were leaving the room to let them rest their heads. WThen when all little ones were in their beds, one of the older kids of the herd asked in a hopeful voice, "Merlin will you tell us one of your story's."

Merlin turned around as he was about to go through the doorleavingefrom exiting the out the room and said, "Aren't you guys too old to being wanting to listen to one of my stories." It was true, the youngest kid beingwas onlybeing 7 years old., but whenWhen Merlin was that age he was more interested in playing adventure game with his friends outside then lying in bed trying to stay awake so he couldto listing to his mother a someone else adventures tells.

"But we barely got to see you today!" the oldest said cutely tryingy to cutely reason with him again and Merlin let himself fellfeall for it, he just didn't have the cold heart to refuse the kids of of their wanted story. So he give it to them, but it was just one Merlin had already told them about before. But the one one they never seem to be tire of.

And why would they? It was the story of whenwhen Gwen the servant got kidnapedkidnapped because she had beenget mistaken for her mistresses Morgana. There was a maiden to recuserecuerescue, bandits to beat, and even a few funny moments to tell about, like when Merlin rubbed rotten smelling Gaius berriesy on his facee. That was theAa part that always sentd the children into a helpless fits of laugher, but Merlin didn't mind, seeing as how that it seeing that it broughtings enjoyment to him toois heart, in that he could make do this for the kids happy.

The tale ended with a slightly sad sighn from the older kids who had manage to stayedcould keep themselves awake through the whole thing and thea peaceful sleepily silences from the younger ones who could not., So Merlin make sure to walk out as quickly and silently as possible for children who were already playing in their dreams.

FMerlin founding his mother in the kitchen by the fireplace, spooning some stew into a small bowl that had probably beenwas left overs from their diner earlier. She f Once she filled the bowl with ever scrape of food she could get, then Hunith she walkeds over to the little kitchen table, not the table Hunith uses to feed all the kids that one Merlin had built in her in the dining room to hold a huge groups of people, but this small one that sat in the center of the kitchen in front of the fire pit. ,S then seitting the bowl down in before afront of the chair that was across from where she herself hwads choosing to sitting down, while on she gestured to Merlin to start eating his meal.

Merlin chuckled at the way his mother still silently trieds to take care of him after all this years. HHe sat down and began eating his strew with his mother mother sitting before him, who was patiently glazing at him until he was completlycompletelye finished with his food to begin speakingdone.

"You have always writenwritten ingto me ahead of your trips out here just so I could have a bed and food readyopen for you. What makes this time different?" Hunith asked politely.

He told her everything that Arthur had asked ofinform him of keeping no detail out, he had never felt in his life that there was ever a time need for him to keep his secrets from his mother, after all she kneows most of them anyways. So he let his words runbe free and he felt thatathat little bit of the tension that had built up ion he had stored in his body start to flow away. Letting hHfrom his shouldershoulders slump down and his body relaxed, relieving him but it still left aving the confusion there for Merlin to deal with.

HunithShe folded her hands together under her chin and stared off into collect her thoughts, being that his life was one big strange eventoccasion Hunith hads grown used to dealing with thehis the unusualness of his life, so and this wasn'touldn't be aany new experience for her but it was a complicated one. So Merlin waited patiently for her to get her thoughts into order.

He didn't wait long before sShe looked back at him and said calmly, "Merlin do you remember what you told Arthur when he asked your advice about what to do about this chose? That he has to live with his own actionsng, thatso he muchshcoulds choose his own way in life.?ice for himself." Merlin nodded his head in confirmations, he had a feeling on where she was going with this.

"You should take the advice that you gave to himout and think about if you want to be the parent of this child", "His mother advised. That was one of the problems he wasn't sure off, if he even wanted to raise a childkid right now., letLet alone livedeal with all the rest of Gwen's plan.

But maybe he could save himself from some of the consequence of Gwen's ideasl. For hHe could secretly have the child then just give it to Gwen to have it raise to believe she was as itss second parent, it, that would save him from the embarrassment of having otherr people knowing what he was going to have to do with his body, the kingdom would be secure ity onces again and the childkid would have a normal life. But aasAs soon as he finished that thought he saw the holes in that plan.

What if he got attached to his child? For eEven if he could give away his babykid there still will still be the question of its bloodline, being that the people will know that an offspring couldn't came from a women that couldan no longer give life, and even if he could made a fake pregnancy for Gwen, the child would he looks nothing like her., Sso others would think that it was either adopted, or that it was Arthur secret love child, either both ways others might would argue that the throne wasn't its birth right, which will leave them where they started in this problem.

Plus there the fact that the royals have rebuiltd Albion on the truth, of their words, to lie now would made the people suspiciousions on what other secrets their rulers might would hold back on from them while they stood in front of them with trustworthy faces.

No, that plan wouldn't work. So he couldn't keep it quiet,ed but that still didon'tdidn't mean he had to raise it. After all if no one has has saween him as a young girl before, he could pretend that he was someone else, like when he had beenwas Dragoon. Then the girl who give born to the new heir and could just disappear having finish her duty and having getting paid. N, no one outside of the royal couple needed to know, not even the heir itself , but then could Merlin contrasted himself againthen chose to let a child know that its parent didn't want it compared that with himself and then he sudden remembered what it was like without his father in his life. He assumed for a long time that his dad just didn't love his mother enough to stay with her,, and how sad andly alone he felt because he didn', not knowing the other half that created himself. He didn't want to do that to a child, especially not to his own flesh, even if that child would cause him great amount pain. His thoughts were interrupted by Hunith sudden needing to speak onceut again.

"Arthur said you don't have to do it. But you won't listen to him, because you're my sweet child, that always wants to help everyone out.", "Hunith said proudly and reached over to rub his arm. Merlin wondered if he could behe like her as a parent, always sweet,, understanding and and gently firm in raising her son to be good and kindright.

"Do you think I would be a good parent?" "Merlin asked her, seeking confirmations from in his role model.

"You are a kind person and you do so well with the little ones, that I couldnan't image you not being a good parent. But having to fully raise ing a child is hard even ifwhen the child is good and you love them. , minded Tthe jobs itself is unthankfulthankless, nerve-racking and there will be no breaks from it. So the only way you can really know if you would be a good parent to your childkid is when you already have one," Hunith said honestly.

Merlin gently slamps his head down toon the table in, because of the frustration, nothing seemedng in to feeling of not being helping himed in coming to a decisionchoice. This wasn't going to be a normal pregnancy and the heir will not have a normal life, because it willould be born from a naturally bornman boy that had turned himself into a women just, so the kingdom could have a future leader. With all that it will have to deal with in its life, if Merlin chose to give it life, the least he could for do for his maybe child is raise it out of love and to do that he has to know if he would be is is a good parent.

"But I may have an ideasomething that can help prove to you what kind of parent you are, " His mother said seeing his stress, Merlin picked his head up again to look at his mother in hope, and waited for her to reveal her plan.

"There is a man that lives in this village whose wife is sick, and he as well as nursing her back to health he also as to also hasve to take care of their one year old baby girl. The druids have helped as much as they can by making a charm against illness for the baby and curing the mother, but they also wanthat her to naturally heal herself some of the way, so she needs a few days to become fully well again. But the poor father is being drivening to exhaustion by taking caringe of the both of them and they have no family to take in the baby. So I had offered my hand in help and the baby will be here by tomorrow. So why don't I let you take care of the little girl for me while I do my duties give you the little girl to take care of?" "His mother finished.

Shocked by his good fortune he didn't respond at first, so his mother must haved thought that he was coming up with a negative answer, because she continued, "ItsIt's best for you not to start out with a baby because they are the hardest to care offor. of and But withnot a toddler because they are a whole different story in being raise thatBbecause they can understand you, they are a whole different story but looking after her it could help you determine if you can handle a childone. So what do you say?"

He shook his head to clear his mind and to get over him of the shock. Then before his mother could began to think he would refuse her solutionbefore she thought to doubt her solution and he smile at her in the brightest way possible as to give her his answer. She returned his smile, it just happy that they could fix the problem and help her child out, for at least a few days, before the next one revealed itself. But they were both satisfied with just just that much for now.

Hunith put out the kitchen fire, and with a goodnight they headed off to sleep. His mother had her own designed designed room and luckily for him there was still a bed leftopen for him to usetake, but it was with the other young ones. If he had time to, usual he wriotenwrittene ahead so his mother would have can moved a bed into another room for him, but he didn't really mind because the kids sleep through the night pretty soundlessly. So to keep it that way Merlin castthrow a soundless spell as he wentcomes into the room, so as he open the door and tucks himself into a peaceful sleep and he wouldn't wake the othersm from their ownss.

He was woaken up the next day bywith the bouncing movementjuggling of the histhe bed under him. As he discover when he open his eyes it was from by a small blond hair girl jumping on the side of his bed, while the others ones stood around his bed with ambushing him all around giggling inat his faces at his being surprise, for those expressions only told him that, theyy must of decided this was the best way forto get him to get up and to get him to play with them. Grinning he grabbed the girl from her midair as she jumped and flatting her down on top of the bed to tickly her bully unmerciunmercifullylessly. The others wanting to join the excitement decided to ambush him join in into with athe tickley battle, by jump on top or climbing all over and all tackled on top of him to try to bring him down with their numbers.

His mother found him covered with little bodies trying to wrestling him into surrounding and interrupted their play fight by telling calling to themthem that breakfasted was ready to be eatening. The excitement over Merlinn then helped her by in taking the boys to get themselves dressed while Hunith didoes the same to the girls, before dressing themselves. Then Merlin got himself dressed., before clothing himself.

The early meal wass just plain with just bread and porridge that had some kind of sweet red berry mix in to make it easier for the little ones to eat.

After everyone was filled up, the kids demanded hehim to teach them a new spell. He was always happy to teach others more about magic, andbut he truly enjoyed seeingwhen he looked at the children's's amazed faces when he did something magically, and to see how excited they got whenknow they know they could copy him.

MerlinHe decided to only to teach them a simple spell, since he had other plans today. But , how to on makeing a ball of light appear in their hands would be useful, so that if they were stuck in a dark place and of darkest they couldn'tan see their way outthrough to a safe place.

Merlin started his lesson by making the children's sit in a neat circle and slowly pronounce the words, so the kids could repeat it, while also displayinged to them what they were going to do, then slowly preannouncingpronouncing the words again that formed the spell so the kids could repeat it. The older ones released the glowing yellow ball from their pbalms with only a few words of correction from him, but the younger kids could only getbest effected was a flashflaush of light to appear before it that quickly burnt out. Merlin make sure to encourage them to keep at it so they could getbe stronger at using the spell, and not feel bad about not getting it right the first time.

He was doing so by Merlin was rubbing the head of a dark brown hair little boy who, he was crying because the bright light had popped in his face which had scar scarreding him into tears. When afterSo while Merlin had finally got the boy to bewas calmeding down enough that he be fine on his own,the boy he heard a knock on the fronthe door., heHe kneows who it was and what it would mean for him, but he stayed with the childkids until they were good enough to use the spell without him until the boy had gotetting over his fright.

That was whenhen he ended the lesson, but told them to keep practicing atat their own pacetime and they run off through the door to probably go out to outside the back door way to go outside and play their games. Only tThen he slowly walked into the front room and founds Hunith holding a baby cover in rag blankets with a thigh height basket full of stuff resting beside her. Hunith was cooing at the baby, when and his mother looked up at him from the sound he made when stepping into the room when she heard him stepping into the room., sheShe nodded her head towards the little girl as a signal that was wrapped in brown blankets to take so he could take the babethe baby from her arms.

He didn't right away because he know tThis small person could change his life, for a second he was scared of that change and of if he could takeing care of this helpless little person properly. He had some experience with babies from when Hunith had looked after them. But that was wW and when Merlin iswas there to help out and his usual job was, but usually his mother just needed him to mind the older kids so they wouldn't bother the baby. O, only when Hunith was too busy with chores around the house did he get to watch the babieschild, but he has never been the main caregiver for a baby before.

Of course he trusted his mother to tell him how to do something if he was clueless, so the little girl wouldn't be miserable, but that don't stopdefeat the fear. But he neededs to do this, not only for the kingdom, Gwen and Arthur but for most importantly himself. His mother was right in this will be the only time he will get the answer he seek in this deal.

So holding down the fear hHe stepedsteppeds over to them and tookakes the girl into his arms. She was very light in weight, but wasn't unhealthily thin, with wisp of light brown hair on the top of her head and pretty green eyes looking back at him surrounded by in a cutie chubby face. Merlin first thought was he got quite a cutie baby to look after.

"What her name?" Merlin asked.

"Cass." Said his mother.

_**Info: If you go to google to type in magical herbs you get websites on which herbs is mean to do what magical and you guy can see why I picked those plants to make the potion or use it for your own stories. I chose the name Cass because I found out that it was used in the middle ages.**_

_**Loulou2a:**_ I'm glad you like the second chapter. Yeah Merlin will have to do a lot to make his child and the choice of having one won't come easy. I agree that Merlin would try to do anything to help his friends out but that doesn't make it any easier to do. You'll have to wait and see how their lemon goes.

_**shelisa68: **_Thank you for liking my story and here your update, hope you like it.

_**FanfictionHopper: **_I kind of write that part to be taking as either funny or serious and I laugh when I thought it up so I'm right alongside you. I'm glad you like my gender bender idea.

_**ProcrastinationIsMyCrime: **_Yeah Merlin got a bomb last chapter but now he working it out.

_**Kweandee:**_ happy to hear my story interesting to you and here's your update!

_**Kyothefallenkit: **_Merlin got into a really tough position last chapter, but enjoy the update.

_**LadyFromPoland:**_ Thanks for loving my story. That what I wanted to get across in the last chapter and hope I didn't keep you waiting too long. You are right in my misspelling, so thank you for that.

_**GoldenFireFish:**_ Thanks you!

_**Luka Knight:**_ Glad you like it so most and chapter three here to quench your ach.


	4. Chapter 4(fixed)

**Yeah readers, looks like I got some brains turning from the last chapter which makes me very happy to hear. As always thank you for your likes, favorites, and follows, just make sure to keep it up so I know that you guys liked it. I'm also using Merlin news clothes in season 4 as his main outfits and this is a link to show you what I am talking about. **** cultfix(dote)co(dote)uk/merlin-series-4-finale-sneak-peek-15186(dote)htm**

**Hope you enjoy. **

_**Question!?:**___**Merlin and Arthur first night together is getting closer but I don't know which POV to show it as, so I want you guys to choice which one would you want to see more. I could go either way but can't decide which, so I really need your help in this.**

**I do not own Merlin and didn't get money from this story, because it's only for fun. **

**Warning: Slash, Het, Arthur x Merlin, Gwen x Arthur, fem merlin, birth, character death, gender bender. **

**The Will of Magic**

_Merlin POV_

The first thing that Hunith showed her son was the stuff that the father had left behind with Cass. Clothes, blankets, toys and small clear jars with pale watery mush inside of them, that is to be her baby food. When she pull them out he notice that the amount of jars in the basket would only lasted about two days, if the baby girl ate the usual three meals a day.

After checking some more over what they have, they decided to split up the tasks so Cass could be settled in faster. With that Hunith took the 6 jars and went to store them in her cold pantry, so that they wouldn't go bad in the heat of the day. While Merlin took the babe with him to sort out the other room for her, just in case she couldn't sleep through the night she could cry her heart out without waking the other kids from their dreams. There was another room in the house that his mother usually set up with a bed for him, but was used most of the time as a playroom for rainy days and also as a school house. Merlin just easily altered the room to fit his needs, by pushing the books, toys, small tables and chairs aside to one corner of the room with his magic. Then he commanded the old crib that they had stored in the attic, which was still sturdy enough to hold a baby safely, to move itself into Cass new room. Waiting he hears thuds and slides noises getting closer to them until the noise rested in silence in the front of the room. He open the door for the simple light wooden crib to sail into the place where he wanted it.

Then settling Cass into the crook of his left arm, so that his right hand could be free, he started working on putting Cass's things around the room. Placing one of her many blankets in her new crib, then another near the center of the floor, where Merlin gently shattering her few toys with a throw of his hand. Then stored away the rest of her blankets in one of the cupboard that they had just for him. He would have also put her clothes in there if she had any but clothes for babies where only for the rich that can afford for babies to waste on them, leaving commoner to only rap there child's in blankets until they get dirty to then just change them out with a fresh blanket.

Once he placed all her stuff, he looked over that the empty basket but then Merlin peeked over the rim to check if he had pulled everything from it. Looking into its dark bottom his saw what looked like a rough white rag laying in the shadows, but when he pulled it into the light found it to be a rag that someone had tried to make into a girl doll. The white cloth was stuffed with hay that barely filled it and had blue thread line sewn on it to make out where the arms and head where were loose and untangling in places. The smiley face that was sewn on to it was lopsided and only a few threads of blue small thin rope make into hair didn't complete cover her head. It was a simple and a little bit ugly, but when Cass turned her green eyes to it she instantly put her chubby hands out to trying to grab onto one of the limbs. Up until now she had barely turn her eyes to her toys and had been only looking around her new surroundings from the comfort of his arms, when she had lose intersect in staring intensely at the cradle, like she was waiting to catch it moving again. But now he watched as her small fingers tightly wrapped around the doll from him bring it closer to her, to have her than squeezed it to her body, as if she was being reuniting with someone important.

Merlin took another look at her toys, that she hadn't giving a second glance to, nor any indication of wanting to play with them. Most of them where made of wood, there were the basic balls and cubes with different swirling designs on them that almost anyone could buy from a merchant. But there was also one other female doll expect it was made of lead, something also easily mass produced by someone else, which make it cheap to buy. Making the only time a peasant child got a cloth doll was when the mother took the time out of her busy day to make it for them, as most cloth dolls that where sold by merchants were usual expensive and only for the well off. This cloth doll was the most undecorated and poorly made doll Merlin had ever seen, but Cass loved it anyway. He wondered if she could feel her mother's love through that piece of cloth and that was why she clung to it so.

Merlin looked down at the little girl that was now waving her favorite toy around and gently said "You and your mother must love each other very dearly." She made a small sound, unknowingly agreeing with him, but it still melted his heart to hear it from her. As he was enjoying the moment the door soundlessly opened behind him and the voice he hear from it almost made him jump where he stood, as his mother said, "It's time for the mid-day meal, you'll have to feed her now or she'll started to cry soon."

Merlin didn't realize it was already that time, but with his earlier lesson and setting up a sleeping place for Cass he realized that it really would be around that time after all. He would have to make sure not to lose track of time again, if he didn't want Cass's care to be harder on him than it should be. So for now he left her to play in the crib, knowing he had to warm up the food before he could give it to her and he doesn't want to place a baby anywhere near a fire because of it.

He went down into the kitchen with his mother and headed to the pantry to find Cass's food. He saw that Hunith had stacked the jars right in the center of one of her shelves so that he could find them easily. Merlin wondered which one to pick for the baby; they were pretty much all the same color mush with what looked like murky lake water mixed in. The ingredients are a mix of different grains, like wheat or oats that had been grounded into a fine power then added to whatever liquids they had around, making it look and probably taste unpalatable. He guessed he has no choice but to just pick one and hope she would gulp it down for him.

He walked out of the storage room to see his mother cutting a loaf of bread into small square pieces at the table, while he grabbing a small black iron pan that was hanging over the fireplace. There was a huge cauldron already hanging in the center of the fireplace taking up most of the orange flames, Merlin could hear something bubbling within it, but as he just needed a small corner of the heat to warm up her food he wouldn't need to disturb the larger bowl.

So Merlin tipped the jar of food in to the black pan, to then placed it as far as he could into the fiery logs and swatted there until the food had absorb enough of the heat. As he waited he saw his Mother appear beside him with a spoon in hand to turn turning whatever soup she was cooking in the pot, making sure to scarp the bottom so it wouldn't burn because it was closer to the fire. Merlin quickly turned his focus back on his own task, to check if his didn't get burnt either. With since a small amount of food it would be very quick and easy for the fire it burn it. But he kept being distracted by his mother movement who was now making a slurping sound from testing the food she had made.

She suddenly asked him, "Want a taste?" Merlin shook his head to indicate no, worried if he looked away from the pan long enough it would leave the mush vulnerable to burning and after years of eating her cooking he knew she was would make the best meal out of whatever she had.

Hunith didn't mind, she just started spooning the finish meal in bowls enough to feed everyone well. She focus complete on setting the table because there was no need for her to call the kids inside, they were smart enough to tell it was time to come home for a meal and they also knew not to porously miss it either or they would get one of his mother's lessons on manners. The few times he had seen that happen to them it had always left the lone child with a painfully bored look on their face. While he was thinking Merlin made sure to mix the pale mush around with the force of his magic a few times and then he checked on the heat of it with a fingertip. It was warm enough that a few good blows would make it safe for the babe to not hurt her mouth with. So stealing one of the bowl off the small table he poured the food into the wooden half circle. To then let Hunith take the bowl from his hand as she pass by with the others soup, which let him get Cass for her meal.

He was half way up the stairs went he heard the kids come in on time, as they run through the house they called their hello's to him. Merlin yelled out his own greeting back, when he suddenly heard the loud cry of the baby and he rushed up the rest of the steps to take care of her. Standing by the side of the bed he saw Cass's usually grinning face now shrug and wet from crying out for him. He complied with her silent demand, picking up her little body and shushed her like he seen his mother do with other babies. He was able to get her to quieted down to just a few hiccups and whimpers. He at first though that she was crying from the sound he and the kids had made down stairs but there was one other thing he had to check on before he could be sure. So he cautiously stuck his hand into the bottom layer of the blankets near her little legs, just to make sure she wasn't sitting in dirty blankets before he took her down stairs. It still felt dry, so her crying must have come from the noise they made or her being hungry.

Either way her whimpering finally settled down into a quieted curiosity with her distracted of his red coat and blue bandana. Pulling on the nice material around his neck seemed to greatly entertain her.

With her amused, he walked to the door but realized that something was missing before he could touch the knob, when she had been upset she had left her favorite toy in her cradle to let him pick her up in his arms. He decided to leave it resting in the bed, not wanting her to use it as a shield for her mouth when he was feeding her, he seen many battle between Hunith and the babies at mealtimes to not make him wary of it. So he continued on his way to carefully walking down the steps to the first floor with the baby firmly wrapped up in his arms. To head to the dining room to see everybody had already sat down at the table, eating and talking to one another excitedly. The last chair was left open for him, with both his and Cass food sitting in front of it. So gently sitting down with the baby to balance Cass bottom on top of his leg and making sure she was leaning back against his chest with his arm wrapped around her. He knew the one year olds didn't have a very good sense of balance when sitting up or walking around, but he knew she was old enough that she would want to try anyway, but that didn't mean that Merlin was going to trust her to not harm herself.

Now that he was happy that she was secure, Merlin wanted to try to feed Cass before himself, in case she had been crying out earlier from an empty stomach after all. He took a small bit of the pale mushy baby food, blow on it and then carefully spooned it in between her little lips. Merlin probably should have let her practice her own eating skills by feeding herself, but was sure that she would make a mess if she did it and he didn't want to clean up the mess later. He had enough to do with learning how to take care of her.

He got a few more spoons full into her stomach, before Cass decided she was finished and turned her head away from the spoon, with a displeased whine at being fed more then what she wanted. But still Merlin had to try giving her more. Merlin felt bad forcing her, but she barely had any of her food and didn't know if he should be worry about her not large aptitude. He didn't want her to be returned to her parents unwell. With the feeling of guilty hang over his head and with her still fighting him he dropped the spoon back into her bowl in defeat, deciding that he was going to give her a break from the food. But instead of starting on his own food Merlin picked up their cup of water, bringing it close to her mouth to see if Cass wanted a drink. Cass green eyes lit up in recognition and she stretch out her arms to cling onto the top of the cup with her fingers, tipping the lid of the cup until it lean into her mouth allowing her to take the cold water for herself. Then after a few gulps she leant back onto his chest in contentment.

Placing the water back on the table, he pick up his own spoon from his stew to satisfy the hunger clawing the inside of his stomach. It was a chicken stew with raisins, dates, prunes, onions and the grainy bread that he had seen his mother cut up earlier and with many different green herbs swimming around them. Merlin enjoyed the sweet and savory flavor that sat on the top of his tongue, the warm feeling that swept into his belly as he shallow and warmed himself through as he ate. As Merlin sat there delighting in the taste of his food he could understand why Cass wouldn't want to eat too much of that grainy slop, when this nicer meal was sat right next to it to be to compare, beating it in both flavor and appearance.

"Look Merlin I've finally got the spell right." Merlin's thoughts were interrupted by the voice of a young boy. It came from the brown hair child who sat on his right, almost seven years old and one of the younger ones that hadn't been able to do the light spell that morning. Now with a proud smile on his face he thrust his arm out in front of Merlin and a sudden soft round light appeared to float above the palm of his hand. Cass stared at the beautiful mysteries thing in amazement and reach out with one of her fingers to carefully poke at it. Merlin lightly chuckled as her finger pass through the light, but continue to stubbornly try to grab it anyway, as if it would solidify any moment for her to take. But the boy's magic ran out quickly and the light vanished with a blink of the eye. Cass turned her head around to find were it had gone, probably so she could try to catch it again.

He leave her to search for it so he could finish off his soup with a satisfied sigh as he slurp down the last drop. That was when Cass realized that the light wasn't going to return to her, so she turned back towards Merlin to find a spoon full of food in her face again. She didn't take that to well, making him spent the rest of the noon meal trying to get the spoon into her mouth until even everyone else had finished their meal and was getting up from the table. Then Hunith had mercy and told him that if Cass wouldn't eat now then she will be more willing to eat later at dinner. Merlin listened to her advice, it did little for his worrying but his mother was right, he couldn't sit there all day trying to force feed Cass when she clearly wasn't going to let it happen. So he stood up from the table as the kids ran out of the house again, just like they did this morning, but before they reach the door one of the older girls stopped her spring out the door making the other also halt in their tracks to see why.

"Why don't you come play with us Merlin?" the sweet girl invited. Merlin wonder what he should say to them, he didn't want to tell them about Gwen's plan, even if they are old enough to at least understand the situation. It would result in an awkward conversion with them on why and how he would do it, something he really wanted to avoid.

"Um…I have the job of watching after Cass this visit." Merlin said. Hunith always made sure he had jobs to do around the house, usually fixing or cleaning something they couldn't do themselves, so he could set a good example for the children. Only this time the job would last for however long Cass was going to stay with them.

He saw the hope in the children's faces deflate as they replied quietly "ok." He felt kind of disappointed in himself for letting them down like that, but he had to do this for himself and he would make sure on his next visit to play with them longer. So as the children continued outside and Hunith went to clean up the mess at the table Merlin when to climbed the stair once again, he felt this would be a new sort of training for him, away to prove something to himself. Even if it was simply letting Cass play and work off some of her energy that she had left over from this morning it was still a chance for him to learn. That was what he come here for.

As Merlin unwrapped her from the blankets, he saw that she was wearing only a blue child tunic that bottom grow so long that it nearly reach pass her feet; making him gently sit her on her bottom in the center of her toys, as so she doesn't get trip my her clothes. Cass looked at the wooden cubes as if she couldn't decide what to do with them, but got bored of them even before she even tried playing with the things and instead took more interested in exploring the room. Merlin just cross his legs on the ground near her toys, thinking that she would soon grew bored with looking around the room and return to her toys. Merlin watched her as she carefully wobbling up onto her legs to then slowly walk around to every corner of the room that she can get to and feel everything that her little fingers could reach. Her curiosity was fine, until Cass tried to pull her leg up onto a chair to climb higher. Luckily she wasn't tall or strong enough to lift herself over the top of it but Merlin was worried that she would fall because of her weak balance.

"Cass no!" Merlin said, as he quickly strolled over to her and picked her up, moving her away from the chair. As soon as Merlin moved her away Cass began to cry loudly and reaching out to be put back by the seat.

But Merlin still took her back to her other toys, picking up her lead doll to try and distracted her from the temptation of the chair. But she just pushed it away from her while still crying out for what she really wanted. Merlin was confused about what he should do to make her smile bloom back onto her face, until he suddenly thought of a better plan then using the doll that she so disliked. So placing the heavy doll back where he got it and reaching out with his magic for her rag doll, to make it flying out of the cradle and into her line of vision. Once she saw the sewn on smiley face she stared at it in amazement as Merlin swirled it around the air like it had come alive and it wanted to dance beautifully for her. The cloth girl jumped, hoped, span and swirled around in a lively dance similar to the one he once saw a group preform for a festival in Camelot. Hearing Cass laughing as she enjoyed the show, help to decided that she was well amused and that they were going to spent the rest of their time on the blanket together as they watch her favorite toy dance around Cass body in a happy jig, until her head started drooping down in exhaustion of all the excitement of it.

Merlin pick up the tried child to take her to bed while her doll drifted over his shoulder after them, once he had laid her flat onto her back he had her doll squeeze in between her arms. Then he waited until he saw her green eyes vanish behind her eyelids before he walked out of the room to give her a peaceful rest.

Now that he has time to spare it would be the only chance he would have to talk to his mother, who was outside hanging up the laundry. "Need any help?" Merlin asked helpfully, making her moved her head back around to look at him.

"I'm almost done with this, but can you get some clean water from the well as the children will need it to wash up for dinner." Hunith answered grateful for the help. So Merlin grabbed the bucket that was sitting in the kitchen door way from inside the house and headed straight down the path to the center of the village, when he heard his mother yell out to him who was still standing by the clothes that were drying in the wind.

"Check on the kids as well!" He waved his hand to show her he got the message and continue on his way. Merlin was hoping he would see the kids on his way to the well, but all he saw was the people of his village, mostly the druids who keep trying to invite him for supper but each getting a politely refusal from him. As he came up on to his goal he sighed as he hadn't seen even a flash of children running around the people or the houses. All he could do was filled his bucket and turned to the closest person to him, a druid girl with a long black braid hanging over her shoulder with bands nearly covering her blue eyes, wearing a brown plain druid dress that only had a belt wrap around her hips. "Have you seen my mother's children?" Merlin asked. All the druids that he has meet in Ealdor knew who his mother was and knew all about what she did for the magical children, some even knew the children personally from teaching them how to control their magic. So she would know who he was talking about.

"No I haven't seen them Lord Emrys, but if you like I could get a group together to look for them." She said politely. No matter how hard he tried to get the druids to treat him as their equal they won't even give it a thought. In their words 'how can they treat the savior of magic and it people has if they were a common stranger?' So over time Merlin had learned to ignore their formal greetings when it came to dealing with them, but he never will like it.

"No thank you, I can found them myself." He said and then walked along the same route he took earlier to get to the well. He asked a few other people along the way, just in case anyone else might have seen them but none gave him the answer he wanted. So the only other place Merlin could think of where the children could go to without anyone able to see them was the forest encircling Ealdor. He dropped the now heavy bucket inside the kitchen where he got it, it would be after all silly to try to keep the water in the bucket and carry its heavy weight as he looked for the children, to him it would be a waste of energy.

Then he entered into the living greenery knowing where they would most likely be playing. For there was a stream where he found the kids most of the time, either playing in or around the slow flowing waters under the green oak tree that grew to be bigger than two house sitting on top of one other and its branches hanging over the waters. But when he got to the spot he saw something he hoped to never see again. A daring game the kids were playing, a challenge to see who would be the bravest of them all in climbing the highest of the trees limps that reach over the stream. Merlin knew this game well, because he had played it when he was young, until another child who was trying to prove himself to the others had climbed out on a weak branch that couldn't support the smallest of weight.

He could still clearly envision that day, how he felt excitement in playing with danger while innocently laughing with the others as they sat in the breezy branches, until all that was destroyed when he heard a branch break and saw a small body fly pass him down into the water below. After they drag the boy from the water, they found him cold and still, they discover death for the first time by a explaining of the adult some other kid run to get. Merlin know he could have saved his friend in that moment of his free fall, but his mother's voice sound in his head as he reach for his magic telling him not to use it, as well as the shock of seeing him fall had stopped him. There had been no chance of that boy survival. So the children of the past never dared play that game again and Merlin made sure to warn the present day children to do the same. As now Merlin stood horrified at the scene, he wondered why they would do this to him and to themselves.

That thought made him rushed over at the truck of the tree to then yelled out, "Everyone out of the tree, NOW!" The children looked down at him in surprise because they have never heard his voice raise above normal levels expect for laugher. But then they never risked their lives before either, so he doesn't feel bad as he usually would.

Everyone slowly climbed down from their seats in the branches, after a while most of them where almost at the base of the trunk. Then Merlin heard a familiar sickening crack and saw a small blond hair girl falling head first into the stream screaming all the way down. Merlin without really thinking about it did what he wished he had done before the death of the young boy, he stretch his instinctive magic out like a net catching her before her head even touched the water. As she hovered upside down above the stream her streams turn into crying from shock, Merlin flip her right up and gently floated her over to him trying not to make it any worse for her as he bringing her back into saved, in a sicking way it almost felt like he was moving Cass's doll around again with how light and small she was. When she finally entered into his arms he sighed in relief as she buried her teary face into his chest and clung on to his coat as if she was scared of letting go of him. He realized then that the child that almost met her end was the same little girl that woke him up that very morning by jumping on the bed next to him. Reminding him again of what they could have lost that day. So as he rubbed her back trying to comfort her he looked around making sure that all the other kids' feet where safely on the ground.

She calmed down in his arms after a few soothing words of comfort, but he didn't say a word until the tears stop flowing out of her eyes. When he begin questioned the group angrily, "Why would you do this? You guys know you could die from this!" To make his point he gestured to the traumatized little blond who had kept her head in his chest when saying, "If I wasn't here she would have ended up in the rocky bottom of this stream!"

The kids looked at Merlin with guilty faces, their heads hang down low in shame and eyes refusing to look back as his as they responded quietly, "we thought we would be able to catch ourselves with our magic like you do."

Merlin stared at them in horror, because he realized then that this was partially his fault. Every lesson he had given them was encouraging them in use their magic, of him making sure they feel like they could rely on their powers to help solve their problems, unknowingly giving them the idea that they could do more than those without magic. Like the thrilling game he gave them that un-magical couldn't play without consequences. This might not even be the first time they think they could risked themselves like this and get away with it.

"Idiots, your magic won't be able to always save you." Merlin said to them wisely. He had lost the will to yell at them, but he still had a lingering frustrate in his tone. The kids' faces looked confused by his words; after all he had told them the complete opposite most of their lives. He then decided they needed to hear a story, one he has never told them before, about the situation of when he couldn't use his own great powers to help him out of a problem.

"I am not very good at healing magic." He stated. Of course the children were surprised to hear that Emrys the most powerful warlock who had ever existed couldn't do everything he wanted with magic. "When King Arthur was a prince, he was hit in the back with an arrow and left to die a slow death. No matter how hard I tried or how much power I used I couldn't heal his wound" Merlin said. "It was only through the help of another powerful being that his life was save." He sign in shame when he finish by saying, "I will never forget that even with the greatest of powers it will never mend all your problems."

"You should be confident in your powers, but they far from perfect to be rely on. Just because you can float a small object doesn't mean you have mastered the ability to lift anything off the ground. So you must still be careful; because we will all die like everyone else in this world." Merlin explained to them, before asking them "Do you guys understand what I am saying?"

They all nodded their heads 'yes', the situation too sober for words, and then Merlin escorted them back, as well as carrying the girl, to the house where he told his mother what they had done. Scared at what they had risked she gave them a whole new lecture to hear and a punishment of doubled the chores, but to their credit they took it all with heads bowed in acceptance of the judgment. While Hunith was talking Merlin heard the sound of a familiar baby cry above the sound of his mother's voice and he left his mother alone to deal with the little ones on her own. He found that Cass had finally wet her blanket, Merlin fixed it as fast as possible for her, remembering his mother telling him once that if a baby is left in its waste for too long it would get a rash. But with a wipe of a clean rag and rewrapping her in some fresh blankets, she was good as new.

As she settling inside her new dry blankets she smile cutely at him for being comfortable again, he responded back the same way out of habit but it didn't feel right. Even with how cute she was he couldn't get what happened with the other kids out of his mind and how one day when Cass was old enough to seek out adventure for herself, she would found that trouble has come along as well. Really thinking about, he supposed that every child had to meet trouble at some point in there life, so that they could learnt more about the world and how to survive in it. But then it wouldn't be just Cass or the children he had to worry about, it was also about his, maybe, future child. Because not only will the child meet with problems someday, but it will also have a live with the troubles that come from the circumstances of its unnatural born.

Could he put his child into that position? Could he be wise enough and have enough strength to raise his child to be victorious over his enemies? Merlin didn't have the answers to that yet; it would all depend on how much he wanted a baby of his own.

But as he looked down at Cass he had a strange feeling he would know soon what that future would be.

_Info:__ I research medieval toys for children and it seem lead dolls or wooden toys were a very cheap toy that the common kids use to play with. So I give her a lead toy because it was historical accurate but don't worry Cass doesn't like it too much. And there were no diaper back then so they just set them in clothes or blankets then change them out whenever they got unclean. The soup is also a real stew that they use to make back in the middle age._

_**Luka Knight: **_**Thanks, glad you enjoy the idea.**

_**Loulou2a: **_**There many questions that need to be answers before Merlin can even think about saying yes. But I happy I could make your brain think about it so much, that was one of my goals in writing this story in the first place!**

_**LadyFromPoland: **_**I love their mother and son relationship as well, so it wasn't a hard choice to pick her to be the one to give the advice Merlin needed. After all who better to get advice about parenthood then from a parent? You'll have to read on to see how Arthur reacted to Merlin little trip.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Yeah readers, thanks as always for the support. I'm still having problems with my computer, basically it sometimes won't charge it battery when its plug in and it won't be a quick fix, so these chapters will most likely come out slower. But I still hope you stick around and enjoy.**

**I don't own Merlin Tv show I just write this for fun. **

**Warming: Het, Slash, Birth, Character Death, Arthur x Gwen, Arthur x Merlin, fem/merlin and gender bender. **

**The Will of Magic**

_Merlin POV_

Seven days had come to pass before Cass time with them ended. This last few days of caring for the cute babe was pretty much the same as the first day he got her. Many ups and downs as he learned how to best look after her or learned how to stand the moments when there was no reason for her upset screaming, then knowing there no cure for it.

Then there was the other lessons he had to learn to endure like her refusal to eat, her accidently hurting herself and every grouse thing that her body produce that he had to clean up after. It was like his mother had said it was hard and tiring work but after a while of him getting used to the load on his shoulder he did enjoy the moments were she showed him her sweet side, oh how he treasure those moments more than anything Cass could spit out at him. Especial when he get her to smile or have her burst out with laugher because it then proved to him that he was doing something right by her and that she was having a good time with him after all.

Now with the experience he no longer feared looking after a child and it seems Merlin has his answer now, just like Hunith said he would but he truly didn't figure that part out until on the seventh day a knock came on to their door.

At that time he, Cass and his mother where in her room playing with the little girl. That when they heard the sound and Hunith left to greet whoever was standing on the outside of the house, so that he could keep watching Cass who was still playing with her rag doll. Until he hears her return with the opening of the door to Cass made up room. "The mother is here to take her baby home, "his mother told him through the crack of the open door, not needed to clarify who she was talking about.

With those words he was both equally glad for her mother's return health and sad as they pack up the baby stuffs so she can leave his care, unlikely that he will see her again. But even with his feeling wanting to dominate him Merlin still made sure to bundle her up in her warm blankets and that she had her doll cling in her hands, for he know that if she had lose it she would play with anything else.

So with both relief and dread haunting his slow steps down the stairs once again to get into the front room it didn't help that he saw a healthy smiley brown hair woman that was wearing a very plain green dress. Now that he has seen one of her parents Merlin instantly thinks that Cass must have inherit a lot from her mother side especial her forest green pretty eyes.

It only toke a second for her to feel Merlin eyes on her and once the woman saw her baby she rush over to collected Cass from his arms while cooing at her of how much she has missed her. Merlin smiled at the united pair even thaw his heart tighten in pain a little bit from his already missing her presence.

She then looks up at him to say gratefully, "Thank you Lord Embry and Lady Hunith for looking after my child while I was too unwell to do so." Merlin will never like how people use his title instead of his giving name but he appreciated her words anyways.

"I should be thanking you instead, for giving me a great child to spend the last few days with, "She looked at her baby with pride at his comment and then thank them one again as she left with Cass in her arms, while carrying the basket over her back. He could all must see the happiness radiating out of them as they went.

But still the moment they vanish through the door way something was empty inside of him. It was a felting he knew right away as being lonely, not from the aloneness one gets from not having anyone around you but the emotion that is created when you walk into your cold quiet house to see no one is waiting there for you. If he was true full to himself this wasn't the first time Merlin had felt this loneliness, sure he now has everything he wanted from when he was a servant but it was all starting to felt empty to him when he couldn't share his life with someone else at the end of the day. It wasn't like Merlin couldn't court a sweet girl but with his famous reputation, huge magical power and his connect to the throne Merlin worries that the girl that was looking at him wasn't seeing him in the eyes of a lover but as a prize to get or worse a thing to worship like the druids did. He shiver at the image of a nice girl caring for him hand and foot because she though he was the savior of magic, some other men would have like that but to Merlin he wanted a partner not a servant. So with the problems of his love life not having a cure to it he did what he has always done with his emotions in the past when he couldn't fix the problem, he buries them alive so deep inside himself that he could almost forget that they were ever alive in the first place.

Now the emotions have dug themselves out of the hole Merlin as push them into and all he could do was spend the rest of day in Cass room to truly give another though to Gwen offer. That which could actually give him the family he wanted without the worry of invite someone else into his life that could maybe not have the right intending for him and with him now knowing he would be a good parent he was starting to think Gwen idea may not have be that bad an deal, even with Arthur having to be the father of his baby.

But this trip didn't solution all their problems that they had to face before being successful with the deal. It wasn't the sex with Arthur that was the issues for he had methods to kind of help with that and it's wasn't the embarrassing pieces of the deal either, after many years of doing things like that he as become used to it.

But what Merlin was worry about was the trouble that may come from the people once they hear of the news and not just the nobles but the common people as well. For he didn't doubt it might become just like Uthur who had turned his fear or hatred for magic into a weapon to make others under his rule to believe that magic was evil and that it needed to be put down for the safety of all, the same could be said for others who could take Uthur example to become a threat to his child life. What makes that situation even more difficult was their jobs is to keep the peace in Albion and if it comes to keeping his child safe or not hurting the citizens then Merlin feared that he would destroy them. From the most common peasant to the richest noble and leave the kingdom in a horrified state. Merlin shiver at the image plaguing his mind.

But that if Merlin could even convince a baby with his female body. In theory if he was a girl at his age he should be able to get pregnant easily but like the people who had tried to use magic to give the gift of life back resulted in no babies, he couldn't know if he would be the same as them.

It became plain to Merlin that they needed a more detail plan then what they have now and not just about how they were going to pull off this idea but also of how his child will be raise. Things like who will be called what to the heir? Who has what rights over the child? And many more question that needed to be answer on what kind of life they will give this kid.

Because if this plan was to work long term then all answers must line up between Gwen, Arthur and him. No doubt they will figure out a way to agree with one another, but there was one idea in his head that he knows the royal couple wouldn't like.

A decision that he has come to make for conditions about who has rights to his child and without this agreement he will not be the one who will be procreating the child. He doesn't care how this was going to affect the kingdom he was choosing to raise a family, not an heir to the throne.

In order to get to that goal the deal was that the royals must make and sign a treated that says Merlin has all the rights to his child above all other powers of government, even the King or Queen. Until his child comes of age by being crowned prince of Camelot and in where it will be old enough to make its own decision in life.

But even in Merlin's own mind he knows this sounded untrusting but there was so many situations where his friends may not be able to be there for his kid and that which would leave him to battle with someone of higher rank or inflection then himself. Like if a co. ruler demands that his child must proves itself by going on a dangerous quest, that could leave them all split in what they want to do, with Arthur wanting the heir to go on the adventure but Merlin wanting the opposite or even Gwen who might think something completely different from them. Opening the wound on who has the right to say what happens to the heir.

If he could he would want to share his kid with them like any normal family but the more Merlin though about it the more he came to the conclusion that they couldn't all be equal in this because he and his offspring will be the ones who will be taking most of the risk in this plan. When they come out with it Gwen will be the woman who couldn't give the king an heir but instead gave the noble sacrifice of giving him to another to have the experience with and Arthur would looked like the king that choice the best oppose for his people instead of his happiness. But for Merlin, not including the druids, people will think that he was sucking more power from the throne. They would think, why else would he be willing to place himself in the woman position and also go through the pain or risk to his life to giving life for the future of the throne. Plus there the way people might see his offspring as an unnatural being and with them being the first to ever do this who knows what the population would really think about his child until they already do the plan.

These are the main reason why Merlin think it was a good idea to have that treated made up because at least that way he could be able to make a better life for the heir without having to fight others to make it so.

But it wasn't like Merlin was going to block Arthur from his say of the kid after all he is going to be the father but the final say would be his alone and he knows they will hate that.

Sadly being a good parent is about doing what you think is right for you child, even if it means hurting others. But Merlin wasn't being heartless about it because they will have the heir they wanted, they just will have to give him the family he wanted as well.

With that thought in his mind Merlin could still smile as he envision his weird family to love and to fill up his new life.

So the next day he said goodbye to his beloved mother and the children of the house. The little ones by now were use to his leaving for long periods of time, so they gave him cheerful hugs knowing he is going to come back to them. Then when his mother give him her own happy goodbye there was a knowing glim in her eyes as if she had already knew what his choice would be. He hadn't told her because when Cass went off with her mother Hunith had left him completely alone and hadn't even asked about what path he had chosen, but Merlin mother probably figure that out before even the baby had left the house.

So he once again packed up his stuff and then politely asked one of the druids if he can use their horse to get back to where he belongs. If he really wanted he could just use his raw magic again and change himself back into his bird form but he thought a nice long ride back to Camelot will give him the time needed to think up his own plan on how he was going to display his deal to the royal couple.

With a quick agreement with the druids he spent the next nearly three days having that long ride he wanted, that even gave him the ability to calm down his nervous a little as he now stood before the gates of Albion Capital. With that he didn't hesitate to go in.

The royal stable hand quickly toke his mount and Merlin made sure to inform him to send a massager back to Ealdor with the horse to be return to its owner. Then he carry his own packs up to his chamber, to see that nothing has be moved or change since the last time he saw his home expect that there was a new unfortunately good size pile of papers sitting on his desk.

But that didn't stop the instinctively relaxation of his body that comes from the end of ones long journey by entering into your true resting place. So as he stands in the enter way breathing in the feeling he suddenly sees his assistant Joan coming in from his indoor gardens and from his obverses of the watering bucket she was carrying she must have been taking care of his precise plants.

It also seems that Joan has been taking good care of herself as well since the day he had left, he was happy that she hadn't work herself until sick while he was way. Because being a druid raised girl she toke her duties of helping Merlin very seriously to the point that she will work while she was either sick or injury and he has to nearly force her into giving up her duties, as well as keep her in her bed because she was so adamant of finishing her duties for him. But today he sees that she was wearing her usual green druid clothes with her blond hair tied up in a bun with braids running along the side of her head up to her golden bangs to the back of her bun and brown eyes so dark that you couldn't see that black circle in the center of them. But that was one of the things Merlin liked about her was her sense of modest and also the way she takes her responsibilities seriously, when not being extreme, but doesn't treat him like some savior that was sent down from the gods but instead as an respected friend. It reminded him of himself when he was a servant except without the banter. That was why he chose her over the other powerful magician, after all he didn't need a powerful caster to watch after his things just her kind personality.

Joan smiles at him when she sees that he has come back to where he belong but it soon turned into a worry frowned and she rushes over to him to asked, "has something happen Merlin? You left Camelot so suddenly that I worried that something tragic is near." Merlin sees that he isn't the only one that watches out for destiny to act up again and puts a comforting hand on her shoulder to calm her emotions.

"No, I just had to think about something important that will change my life." He said with a small calming smile. He could feel her shoulder relaxes under his hand but he sees his words has sparked a curiosity in her dark eyes.

She doesn't wait to expose that feeling by asking him, "will I get to know what that change for you is?" Merlin still smiling vaguely responded, "you and everyone else in Albion will know about it soon. But for now I need you deliver a message to the king and queen that I have returned to court." Joan nodded in understanding and then move around him to get through the door but just before she vanish down the hallway Merlin stuck his head out in the hall to said, now just remembering something else, "And also tell them that I need to talk to them tomorrow morning." With a quick 'yes Merlin' she was out of his sight.

With that done he looked back at his desk and then decided even thaw his was tired he should get those paper signed before tomorrow, so that they could have all the time they needed to plan out the future.

Before that he send a spell to make his packed up stuff float back to where they belong and only then does he sits down at his dark wooden desk. He weave his fingers together then stretch them out to give them a good crack and to get them warmed up for more work to be done.

But He didn't get very far into the pile before he was scary out of his skin from the loud echoing of his door slapping against the wall with the king standing there in his chamber. After calming his heartbeat he realizes that they both must look strange from any outside person, with Merlin looking travel wore with a quill still in his hand dripping black ink onto his nice desk and Arthur standing at the door panting from a run with worry writing all over his face. But to Merlin this moment felt almost like the day this all began, except this time he knows what is coming from Arthur and he was prepare to take it.

"Your back!" Arthur said with a relieved panting voice and continue hesitantly, "I thought… I worry that you were disgusted with us because of what we have asked you."

Guilt sank into Merlin now for not saying anything to them about him leaving but he just didn't want the chance of them trying stopping him when he was so desperately needed to think way from them. Merlin just thought someone would have eventually told them that he has left and that it was all that they needed but Arthur must of toking it as thaw he may not ever come back. "I'm sorry, I should have wrote you a letter about what I was going to do but I was so overwhelmed that I could only think about myself at the moment. I didn't mean to worry you like that." He apologize explained to his best friend.

Arthur finally got his breathing under control and seems to be calming down now, so he said, "I understand Merlin, just don't go running off like a scared child again." He finish jokily and Merlin chuckle at it, relief that he didn't hold a grudge, until he hears a new voice.

"Yes, please don't do that again." Gwen said appearing behind Arthur and walk around him to grab Merlin's hands to then weaving their fingers together so he couldn't let go. Then while they were holding hands she look into his face and hesitantly asked, "Do you have your answer for us Merlin?"

He was hoping to be able to do this on the morning of tomorrow so that he could have lots of needed rest and time to talk about this, but from their eager faces Merlin doesn't think they could hold out until morning light. Might as well get through it now. After all the only thing sleep was going to get him is more focus for their conversion and nothing else.

"Let's sit down." He quietly orders them and gently shacks his hand free from Gwen. To then head to his table and magical moves the books that where pile on top of it to be instead stacked in a straight line down at the end of the table, making a wall of literature at one end, so that there would be more room for them to sit comfortably. The couple sat on one side with their hands resting on top of one another and Merlin sat at the opposite side.

With nothing else holding him back now he firmly revel his answer, "I'm going to help with your plan." Upon hearing the news that she wanted Gwen instantly throw her hand up to her mouth to hold the glee back and to fight against the tears that were beginning to rim in her eyes, Arthur looked surprised at his announcement but was not unhappy about it. But before they could get too far into their victory Merlin place his balm out in front of them like he was trying to hold back their emotion with that one hand then said, "But my help will only come if you agree with certain conditions." When they hear that they quickly came back into themselves and prepared for whatever he is going to say.

"First thing we need to get to is having a better plan then just getting me pregnant and then telling the whole country about it." Merlin continuing saying with a wise voice but then also added, "as well as future plans of how this child will be raised."

"What do you mean how it's going to be raised?" Arthur question him and Merlin confidently responded, "Things like who the child is going to live with once it is born? How will we name it? And most importantly how will we tell the people of its existent without putting the heir life in danger?" Arthur had his mouth hanging slightly open as if he wanted to say something but didn't know how to form the words together to continue on, so Merlin went on without him, "Or small things like who going to be called what to this child. Who's going to be known as father? And Will Gwen be called mother or will that be my title?" Arthur still with his mouth open trying to found the words through his emotions made Merlin look at his wife to see that Gwen was listing to him with a neutral face, giving nothing away with her feature on how she felt about it but knowing she wasn't doing it to keep her feeling back but to giving his words a serious thought.

"After that is solute I then want the power above the royal rank in all rights to raise my child the way I see fit." That was when their faces broke into complete shock and a once calm Gwen asked in a surprise voice, "what?"

"I want you to sign a deal making it so that none of any rank of noble can go against by word on how I can raise my child. Even your royal power." Merlin clarify and trying to send them a comforting smile so as his words wouldn't seem so bad as he continue to explain, "I don't want this because I don't trust you guys but want I don't trust is the others people that might inflection you or try to do something about it themselves. We are most likely heading into a fight and I've have chosen to have Arthur child because I wish to raise a family, not an heir to the throne."

Arthur then yell out suddenly with both confusion and rage in his voice, "I going to be your kid father shouldn't I get a right to my child as well!"

"I will listen to what you have to say but I want my words to be unchallenged, so I can make sure the child remains safe and happy. Beside you might be the father but you will not be the one to go through the risk of giving birth or having to go through the pain of the labor or have to be hurt from the people's opinions at are being throw at you. Unless you're willing to be the woman instead of me, then all you'll have to do is get me with child." Merlin said challengly. He see Arthur suddenly tense up to a point that he almost looked scared of Merlin.

"Already that fine by me", Gwen suddenly said firmly and with a determined spark in her dark eyes. "WHAT!" Arthur said shocked by her answer for him, but she just calmly said to him, "His right, he is taking all the risk here and it isn't like he going to take your child to lock it up in a tower or something equally as bad. This is Merlin we are trusting so he going to do what is right by all of us and this child. So there no need to fear Arthur."

Arthur looked like he didn't want to agree with her but couldn't found a way to argue back. Seeing this Gwen then grabbed Merlin hand that was laying on the table and rubbed his knuckles in comfort with her thumb. He didn't know what she was doing until he saw her husband staring at their join hands, he realizes then that she was silently showing her husband that she was with Merlin and that she trued him.

After a while of staring at their fingers he reclusively agree with the nod of his head but he still didn't look completely happy about it. Merlin wouldn't either but he had to think about this child first before even Arthur feelings.

With that part out of the way they spend the rest of the night planning for the day Merlin turned himself into a woman and continue on to the point of what was going to happen after he give born.

They decided that they will preannounce to the whole of Albion of how Merlin will to be the one to bare the future heir and then they will wait a week to see how the people will react to the news, if it went well enough then they will go through with the plan, if not they have to re-strategies. But after that he and Arthur are to then chose a different room from their owns where they are to try to get Merlin impregnate every night until he was either with child or they determine that he couldn't create new life, like Gwen. But if it work then he is to carrying the child ,everyone agree on this, in the safety of Camelot walls but will still continue his work as long as it wouldn't put stress on his body and that it remains in the border of the city capital. After all that was done and the child has taking its first breath of air it will then stay in Merlin care by living in his chambers, but of course the couple are allow to come see the child whenever they want.

Then they decided on the family titles they would take. Gwen wanted to be call auntie as she explained, "it won't be my child." Merlin toke Daddy because it was the closest he could get to the title mommy without it being girly or dad for when it got older. Arthur was happy to get papa for his name and father for when they are around the nobles. But the most important name, the baby's, will be chosen by him and Arthur later on.

The plan was finally coming together before Merlin's eyes until Gwen asked gently with a little blush to her face, "Will we need to hire a wet nurse Merlin?" He felt his face go hot and knows that it was as red as one of those rotten tomatoes that where throw at him when he was stuck in the stock and the same happened to Arthur face as well.

The true was that Merlin hadn't really thought to deeply on the details of what his womanly body will have to go through but he thought about it now by trying to envision what it would be like to watch another with his baby. Merlin didn't liked the image of a stranger holding his baby up to her breast to nurse when he could have done it himself and could have gain some bonding time with his babe. Besides he did said earlier that he was going to raise his child the best he could and this would be one of the thing his would have to do.

"I'm sorry Merlin but we need to know if we should start looking for one, but also we need to who is going to pay for the service?" Gwen said apologetically. Shaking off his embarrassment and trying to cool down his heated face he said," No…no it's ok. But I don't want a stranger feeding my new born so I will do it until it's is on solid food." She accept it with a nod with her head but their faces stay blush until they finally left their meeting.

With all the details set into place to be release on to the future he finally felt that this was a well-made plan that they could get all they wanted from it.

**_LadyFromPoland:_** I think everyone has doubts when it comes to being a parent but I have always view Merlin has a good parent and I hope you enjoy his return to the city.

**_Loulou2a:_** Thanks for loving what I had Merlin do so far and another thanks for answering my question, but I agree with you that it would be very interesting to see how Arthur will see his best friend through all this.

**_Luka Knight:_** Thanks for answering my question and it would be interesting to see Arthur view on things.


	6. Chapter 6

Yeah readers, sorry it take so long to get this out but I've finally have a working computer so I can start writing this story again but I'm getting a new job so I'm going to be busy with that so if this take a bit to get out then that why. Also I decided that it would be better for you guys to have a better read then what I can write so I'm looking for a beta to help me with this story, but so far nothing. If you would like to beta my story (or recommend someone else) please feel free to send me a message through the comments or PM me and I'll check you out to give you an answer. Thanks for all you guys support and keep it up to let me know how you like it, hope you enjoy.

I do not own Merlin this story is just for fun.

Warning: Arthur x Gwen, Arthur x Merlin, Het, Slash, fem/Merlin, gender bender, birth, character death.

**The Will of Magic**

When Arthur and Gwen stood on the balcony for a second time this year instead of talking about the end of the royal line they instant spoke of the future of the country while holding up a graceful authority that only the people that had natural leadership could achieve. The couple stood before the faces of the shocked and confused people that throw up many different questions from both the citizens in front of them or their own council members from the side, each one was answered in a calm informant matter. As Merlin watch from the castle walls a safe distance away he sees the people were taking the unusual situation quit well, because as the questions that were shot one after another they were curious or intellect then from a place of rage or demanding opinions, leaving the only sense of distress from the undertone awkwardness that came from talking about the king having intercourse with another man. While this was a great relief still if he looked hard enough he could see a few face in the crowd filled with disgust and nothing else, but luckily none of them become a trigger into starting a riot in the collection of people down below.

This mind set continue beyond the day of the announcement and into the week that they waited to make sure the people don't suddenly decided they wanted to protested this monstrous acting at the castle gates. They didn't and Merlin thinks it was because the people were just as worried about this country fate as they were to the point they are willing to take anything that doesn't hurt anyone or forces anyone to do something against their will. But because the plan had such a accepting respond a new mood had develop whenever he and Arthur were even in the same area as the other that they would get constantly strange stares from the people milling in the room, so they had taking up avoid one another unless something demands it. But Merlin figure that after the others got use to the thought of them being together in that physical way and as a unit of parenthood they will soon stop that too.

Now with the peaceful week passed by, the concerns of his knighted friends address after having a long night talk with them with mend in their belly's and his agreement signed things were near to prefect as they were ever going to get it again. So they finally settle on a date to impregnate him, a day without any work needed to be done by them.

So the day before he and Arthur where planning on meeting up Merlin was in his chamber just shooing his assistant out the door as he had just dismiss Joan for the evening, locking the door after her. Then he went to the draw of his desk to pull out the gender changing potion that he had made earlier on into the day and stared at the grays blue mist like liquid contained within the glass that he balance in palm of his hand, he was amazed for a moment on how such a small thing could change so many different life's in so many different ways.

While he looked at his fate he asked himself one last time if there was any doubts floating in his mind waiting for a moment to pop up where he could no longer get out of this situation. All that was there was the thoughts of a lonely empty home, the feelings he has when he see people his age enjoy their families when he couldn't even begin one because of his work or his savior title blocking the way for him and the pain that they will have to take from those few disgusted people in the crowd. Because even now he could still go to Arthur demanding to stop the plan knowing his friend wouldn't force him into anything this extreme without his approval. But with that he also knows what will most likely happen if he doesn't go through with it. He doesn't get the family he needs to cure his aloneness, the king is left without the mother he wanted to bare his heir and then finally without a doubt the council will demand they found another consort because the method had been accepted by the royal couple leaving them no room to deny them. But even with all that that has been laid down upon his shoulder he didn't felt pressure or scared from it. This is want he wanted no matter what this child would become or what would happen because of it because he desired a kid to love for his family and nothing more.

So with his minded cleared he uncorked the value with his thumb and throw the potion back down his throat. The change was much like before in that it was unpainful and instant. His head suddenly begin being weighting down from his hair growing out beyond his forehead while it also blocked his eyes view from the rest of his changing body. But he could still felt it moving into its new form by adding weight on to his chest into two enlarge sphere while his hip bone widening for birthing and the most disturbing change of all was his dick shirking as his balls goes into his body to have the both of them move in ways that he couldn't even describe to himself. His felt the less amount of motive in his face but he could still tell some of the fine bones that made up what he looked like to other where changing it shape as well. He thinks could have even shortening in height a bit but couldn't tell from all the other bigger changes that was happening with him all at once.

He didn't have to stand there for very long for everything to stop adjusting to its new form. Once it has he quickly parted his long locks with the ends of his fingers tips and picks up a hand mirror he had set out for himself to see this form. The girl starring back from the reflection had long black hair that had settle at her waist with hips that flare out for better child bearing purposes. As his eyes travel back up over her flat stomach he discover her breast was big enough to fit comfortably inside somebody hand, but quickly divert his eyes so as to not get into that situation. Instant his eyes search farther up to her face that had a point jaw line with big pink lips as well as thick black eyelash flutter over her blue eyes. Then there were the other smaller details that made her different from him like the softies of her shoulders, the thinness of her fingers, how her big ears stick out only little bit because they were tilled closer to her head then his where that lets her hair to better hid them from view and how she really was a few inch under his height.

From Merlin point of view if he had seen this girl walking down the street of Camelot he would have thought that she was cute and maybe would have talk to her because of it. He then remember who this girl really was and he shiver at the though of thinking of himself in that kind way.

No, not himself, he was going to be a girl for a very long while and he should accept the fact that he is now a she even if he was still a guy in his own mind. That is why he change so early because he thought it would be better to get use to everything about her new body now instant of at the last moments of him not being in motherhood. So after settling down the mirror she slowly peeled off each article of clothing until she revealed her completely naked body to his male mind. It was weird seeing himself in this feminism soft girlish body that as he looks down at it he couldn't believe that it was really him and not his magic playing tricks on his mind. While in disbelieve he unconsciously brought his hands up to cup her apple sized breast, the moment he did touch them he harshly flinch back from the sudden sensitive touch jolting through his body and a feeling of wrongness from touching a girl chest.

NO, he . . . she can't think like this there was nothing wrong with touch your own body and this was HER BODY. So with a raging determination to merge her body to her mind she grabbed herself once again to gently palming the spheres on her chest to get use to them being there by touch and having this good feeling that was jolting through her body by the massage. Even with a red hot blush on her face she didn't stop herself there but continue on by trailing her hands down the flat plane of her stomach and into the farthest parts of her that her hands could reach, which was the area between her legs to search for the proof of her vanish manhood. Even now she expected to feel her lower lost limb to be hanging there but there was nothing there for her expect for the acceptations of her new core.

For a moment she felt a small sense of loss about it, thaw she knew it wasn't going to be a permanent state still the thought didn't make her feel anymore right about losing a part of herself that use to make up a fraction of her identity. The only way that Merlin could think of to get pass that was if she can found some new sense of pride in her female body and in what it could do, rather than be sad in what she trade that ability for. So she reminded herself that this vagina she was touching the outer lips of will born her a family. That this hole she found with her finger tips will be the place her child will be brought into this world as well as the thing that will help make her heavy and round with that life, thaw she could hardly believe that something could squeeze through that tight space. While she was finding pride in her lower area she also discover it was very sensitive by just her touch alone would spark the good nerve inside of her and make her area slick with some kind of want, that made her think that it wouldn't be so bad being touch down there has she originally thought it would. When that thought pop into Merlin mind her face flowed with very more red the even before to where most of her body was cover in it and it overheated her in embarrassment that made her hands rip away from in between her legs. For a while all she could do was calm down her blush with the intake of cooling breathes until her no longer could be compare to an fresh apple anymore but still Merlin worried about those unexpected feeling. Were women really that effected by touch or was it because he wasn't use to a more sensitive body then his male form? The only way for her to discover that answer is if she could ask another girl how she felt about her own private parts and she wasn't ever go through that horror. All she could do was dash the worry aside as best she could and redress in her now tighter clothes to then go about her normal routine to go to bed.

She would have had a better sleep that night if she wasn't so conscious about how her breast got in the way of all her sleeping positions.

**Next day**

Merlin wake up to the sunlight that stricken through the black fuzzy of hair that was sticking on to his eyes and on the inside of his mouth. He sat up splattering the hair way from his face and wondering where all of it came from, but that was quickly answer when he felt the bounce of his unbound breasts that then reminded him that she was now of the fairer sex. Thaw she probably didn't look like it with her tangle hair matted up in different directions from one night of sleep and her breast falling out of her night shirt.

So she readjusted herself and she spend most of that morning trying to brush out her long dreads with a weak comb she only used to straight her male side short hair. After hours of painfully untangling the knots she finally got it smooth enough that she could put it up in a hairstyle that will keep it out of her way, she seen her mother do it multiply times to understand the basic of it but it seems even with that her clumsy finger still couldn't made anything else other than another huge knot that she would have to comb out again. She was so use to her hair being so much closer to her ears that even with the basic knowledge she still needed practice before she would even get the desire result she wanted.

But maybe it would be easier to go back to her old hair style. After all she just needed the working parts to make the baby and keep it alive, she doesn't need to look like a girl to do that.

So she jumps up to go to her cupboards to grab an old but still sharp dragger, a small wooden bowel which she fills with the left over water from the pitcher from her late night dinner and the plain hand mirror she use the other day. Setting the stuff down on her large table she sits down in one of the chairs and balance the mirror in between her thighs so that she could see what she doing without using her hands, it was difficult to do all this things at once and usually Merlin had her mother or Gwen help her in cutting her hair when it got to long but she didn't want to this time. So once she titled the angle of the mirror enough to see her face she grab a lock of hair in the front and started sawing at it with the dagger.

As threads of hair fall to the floor the door suddenly open and a female 'gasp' coming from it but before she had time to look up to see who it was her dragger was rip out of her hand. "Yeah!" Merlin yelled out annoyed and reach for the knife that was being held above Joan head. Merlin in her old form would have easily have taking back the knife but with her shortens in height combine with her sitting down to keep her only mirror from crushing to the floor Joan had no trouble keeping the tool out of her greedy hands. "Why are you chopping off your hair?" Joan accusingly asked her.

She knew she shouldn't have magical unlocked her door that morning, but she argue with herself that someone could need her assistant. Funny how sometimes good intense were not pay back in kind by fate. "Because it's going to get in my way, "She said then waited for the knowing argument of the strong headed druid. "But it will look weird."

She narrow her eyes at Joan to intimidate her into give up the dragger, but she instant gave back her own determent glim with her eyes and said, "I can easily tell it's you Merlin. I also know that your girlish look will not go with your old haircut and to others it will seem like you are trying to stay a boy." Merlin didn't fall for the weak excuse and pointing out the real truth, "you just don't want me to cut my hair."

"Yes!" Joan yelled out now that Merlin knew her real motive and she added on, "You look so pretty like this with you hair being so glossy and long. It would be a tragic to just chop it off to make your life less frustrating." It seems like Merlin has finally found something that ticks off her assistant just as quickly as poking at stick at an angry dog. Which now that she was thinking about it Merlin had always see Joan hair clean, tided and for most of the time up in some kind pretty complex hairstyle.

"I'll teach you how to do a simple braid, "she shot the solution at her. Merlin slump in surrender to her assistant determination, knowing she wouldn't let her do it her way but besides that if it was an easier method to style her hair then what she was trying do and if there was a teacher to show her how she doesn't see the problem with at less trying.

She regretted that thought because it seems just like before an easy braid for her was really how to knot your hair in different ways or how to get you hand stuck in your half made braid. So the mid-day passed the same as the morning trying to get the twist of her hair into being neat enough that Joan would allow her to be release into the sight of other people. But by then the moon was already out shining its light bright into the sky, even then she didn't leave because she was still too busy also preparing something's for the night with Arthur.

After she had place her work in a wooden box she goes to the door of her chambers to leave but she hears Joan make a sound in the base of her throat. Turning around her founds Joan with a bandage wrap in her hands and says, "I don't think you want people to look at your chest more than they already going to be do." Then sends a pointed look at her chest, making Merlin look down herself to discover she as forget about her free bouncing breast. Of course she be to worry about Arthur to notices something about herself and just reach a hand out for the wrap. But Joan once again takes something out of her reach saying mischiefly, "What if you don't put it on right and it falls off on your way down the hallway. No, you probably need me to show you how." Merlin knows her assistant was really enjoying her new state but not this much. With a blushing face she covers her breast protectively with her arms has Joan walks closer while continue talking as if Merlin wasn't horrified about it, "We both women now Merlin so there isn't a problem anymore." Then Joan grabs her shirt to try and take it off Merlin body but she holds firm while yell out, "No!" But the smart person that Joan is she already had a way to solve that. "You going to have to get use to me coming in to your private life. You don't think in the weeks of not the months that are coming you wouldn't need my help telling you what going now with your body?" Merlin know she was right and had enough expected Joan to help her out in that way but that doesn't mean she was any more comfortable doing something like this. But she still reluctantly loose her hold and the shirt pop off her body with an easy pull. Then she stood there not looking at Joan waiting with held breath to get her to show her how to bound her chest until Merlin realizes that her assistant wasn't doing anything, she toke a peek up at her face to see her glaring at her chest. Shocked she blurted out, "Why are you glaring at them like they just insulted you." She replied simply, "there bigger than my." Merlin head shot down to confirm that was true but still yell out, "So?" That seemed to bring Joan back from the hate she now had for Merlin chest and just told her, "You soon learn women are harder on other women." Then she unwrap a part of the bandage to then pull the strip tight between her hands with a good nature smirk and continue now to teach her the ways to properly bound her chest.

So the person who ended up being the second person to see him like this was Arthur when they met up in one of the castle silence tower. The tower was only one small room and stander compare to the other luxuries in the castle but for what this room was needed for it was perfect. With only one bed that toke up most of the space, along with a plain chest resting at the end of the bed and a nightstand were the only other things that could fit into the space without blocking a pathway to walk around the room. She found Arthur sitting on the bed with his back to her starring outside the single narrow window in the tower that let in the light. The moonlight showed that Arthur was wearing just a red tunic and brown breech but also show he had just been cleaned from a fresh bath as he doesn't stink from that day training.

He must have not hear the sound of the door when she came in as he didn't move from his thoughts when she closed the door, so she walk up until she was standing on the right of his shoulder. "Arthur?" Merlin asked insertion her presence. He jerk with surprised at the sudden approach of a person but after the shock of the scared wore off Arthur really looked at her face with an unreadable expression. As well as slowly run his eyes up and down the full length of her body still wearing the same unchanged face. Merlin really hopes that nothing bad was being thought about her under that face.

**Arthur POV**

The moment he saw her he no longer could clearly pin point what he accurately feel about this women. For him the emotions rage inside of his heart battling one after another but giving up no true victor between a mix up of confuse, surprise, shock, nervous and finally admiration that all came together from his one fatal look to the figure over the right of his shoulder. But even with the emotional battle blocking up most of his mind Arthur still didn't expected skinny little Merlin to be looking like this. Now he didn't think Merlin would turn out ugly just more on the plain side than anything else, what with his big ears being the only thing that would stand out about her, but this form however is truly pretty in that cute kind of way. Still gangly with her thin limb, her ears as large as ever and looking like a strong breezes can push her over on to her butt but very different than what he had expected which was for him to still look mostly like his male side just with womanly parts.

Despite the obvious lower body changes her face had molded into a more feminist structure by changing little detail along his face and refreshing up her whole appeases, all which didn't discourage him from staring at her in a way that he had never before.

How did Merlin get such an appealing look to him or was this just what the women saw in Merlin just flip for males now? That this will be how all the male will see her now? Arthur didn't think he can stand the answer to that not with all this new emotion awaking inside him about his best friend to add to it.

"Are you going to be ok, Arthur? "Merlin question him in a lighter female voice. He then realizes that he had been staring blankly at her has if she was a puzzle he couldn't understand how to start solvating. Arthur jumping heart try to look for anything to avoid the unclear answer to Merlin question. With luck he sees the excuse to his problems in his observes of her holding on to small wooden chest. "What in the chest?" Arthur ask quickly. Merlin looked down at it has if realizing she was holding something in her hands this whole time.

"Lust potions to help us get through the night, "Arthur wasn't giving much time to think about that before she continue, "but before that I need to cast a fertilization spell and we need get undress if you don't want your clothes to be shredded by morning." Before he knew it Merlin had already sat the box down on the nightstand and sat down on the other side of the bed murmuring ancient words he will never understand. There was a faint yellow light that flash under their skin from the both of them but quickly fainted away, the only thing that was left in its place was this refreshing feeling flowing through his systems like he just awaking for a nice long sleep or had just gotten out of a hot bath, either way he was re-energies for a task. Until Merlin turned away from him and began taking of articles of clothing which he quickly looked away from then reminding him that he did not know how to deal with his raging emotions or how to move pass them. Nervous sweat was collecting along his back as he heard piles of clothes being discarded on to the floor until there was nothing but awkward tense silences hanging between them.

He heard Merlin shift on her spot, then there was the sound of wooden cricking open. Realizing what she was getting out he burst out, "I don't want to use the potions!" There was only stillest on the other side of the bed until suddenly there was a dip from the bed being weighted down in the middle and Merlin spoke from it, "That fine I guess, since all I have to do is lay here and keep my legs open." Arthur was relieve at first because it didn't sit right with him to force themselves to be attracted to one other, but he went over her words again it made him think about it from Merlin view in that if they couldn't lust for each other even a little bit then her experience will be painful. Would that not be rape or is it painful consent? He stomach turned at that question for he never wanted anyone to go through that especial if he the one making them go through it. No one should have their first times together like that, with that thought birth a new question in Arthur heart.

Was this Merlin first time having sex with any gender? Arthur turned his head just enough to see her head laying down on the pillows with her black hair freely spread along them and her eyes staring up at the ceil waiting for him to make his move. "Are you a virgin?" Merlin looked at him in surprise but then full blown blush when she saw he was looking at her, she didn't back down thaw and said, "Does it matter? I just have to be like lump of wood and then it be over with." Her voice sounded with a bit of fear and he knows that Merlin wouldn't have hesitant to answer him if she know the answer would brother him. Irony her lie gave him the truth and finally a way of acting.

He would have be nervous about it if it wasn't for his already knowledge of the passionate act and the determination he now had that erasing everything else. Making him crawled to and over her laying body until his hands sat on either side of her head to then speak to her surprise face, "It matters because I don't want you suffering through this Merlin."

Then he lean down and made their lips met in a one-side passion kiss as she was in a frozen state has their lip mesh until he pull his head up for air to say, "Just feel it Merlin." She bit her lower lip in thought but nodded her agreement to let him pick it up again but this time Merlin added her own shy kiss into his demanding ones. Once they got into a rhythm he poked his tongue in her mouth exploring the lining of it, he heard a squeak from her when his tongue rubbed along hers trying to get it to dance with his and with a little hesitating it did. Then Arthur cup her left breast and gave it a soft squeezed making Merlin this time yelp out at the touch. Arthur knew that she is losing focus of how he was making her feel by rush things a bit but he needed her to learn not too fear his touch because he was going to do must more to her soon, so he ask her, "how does it feel Merlin?"

"What? . . . weird I guess?" She responded back in a question tone. "Descript it to me, "Arthur said not satisfied.

With a redder face then before she detail, "when you touch me like this it send this . . . this good felting pulsing down to. . ." Merlin stop unable to say it, Arthur understand that the loss of one manhood wouldn't be easy to speak about but even in this situation Arthur couldn't help but tease Merlin about it to get rid of the fear.

"Like this?" He said messaging the hand that lay upon her breast while thumbing her pink nibble in a circle movement. She moan at the acting but quickly throw her hands over her mouth to cover up the sound. But the noise help Arthur to get hard. So he grabbed both her hands in one of his and pull them above her head, leaving her to meow or writher in embarrassment at his continue squeezing and rubbing. A small 'no' came up between the cute moans from her mouth but Arthur didn't give into her demand and said, "I need to know how you feel Merlin."

Then toke her tit into his mouth to suck on it unmerciful making Merlin arch her back from the new add pleasure. He only lets go to her hands after he could smell her for where his head lay sucking on top of her breast and unable to help himself he touches for the first time that special area in between her legs with his fingers but teasing around her outer lips, making her give out a loud moan for him. "So sensitive Merlin, "he pants into her ear after detach from her breast with a good lick to the tip.

Now he was truly hard and horny enough to explore how much more pleasure that they can have together. But before that Merlin needed to be more prepare for him so he penetrate her hole with his middle finger to widen the slick space for him. At first she just made a few uncomfortable noise so he distracted her by touching along her body feeling out every curves and slop she has. Just trailing his hands over the top of her breast, to down to her ends to squeezing her butt and even driving his tongue back inside her mouth encourage a battle with her own. Soon she was ready for the second then the third finger to farther reflex her out. Arthur could have easily dip into her then but he remember he wanted as less pain as possible for Merlin and to get that he had to doubt check if she was lubricant enough, even if her liquid was running down his fingers.

So Arthur slowly kiss his way down between the valley of her breast along to the flat plain of her abdomen and parted her thighs to make room for his head. "What are you . . . aha?!" Arthur mercilessly gave her no time to complete her question instead he twisted his tongue around her cunt collecting her sweet moister in a circling strokes, pleasing her so much that Merlin unconsciously thread her thin fingers through his hair to keep him firmly in place. There was no need for he like it there, pushing his tongue into her own to tasted this unique kind of sweetest that he couldn't compare to any pastry, fruit or even his own wife who tasted of strawberries.

Arthur instantly exile the last thought from his mind, when he enter this agreement he vowed to himself that while in this room there couldn't be any spare thought giving to Gwen or his lower region wouldn't make it through the night if he let his mind be devour by anyone else besides him and Merlin.

So to rid of it completely out of his head he no longer tip toe around his lust and thrust all of his tongue farther inside her cunt so that it cover his tasted with Merlin sweeties and so he could drown in the pleasure of the sound he was making Merlin voice out above him. By her moans and the hair tearing hold she had on his head he knew she was completely taking over by the lust he was giving her. Now was the time for him to dive into Merlin panting lustful hot body. So giving a quick suck on her nub he sat up to tear off his clothes with the help from Merlin then to crawl onto her again as he had when he started this, while disjointing her hand from the firm grip on his blond hair.

Looking down at her was a site he would never forget in his life with her eyes pit black with lust that he couldn't even see the blues in them anymore, panting huffs of hot air on his skin, body flash with a light blush, her legs parted eagerly for him to take and her long hair tangle from the trussing about she had been doing from her pleasure. It was beautiful, it was sexy and it got his penis turned up to hard it was touching his stomach. If this wasn't Merlin first time he wouldn't have hesitant to take what he wanted as quick as possible. But he somehow held down the instinct to take it the fast rough way by gently he lined up their procreating organs and was about penetrated her body when Merlin suddenly called out to him.

Then she simple raised her arms out towards him in a worldwide show of wanting to be held in others arms. So he instantly complied by fall into her arms to have them wrap around him and he did the same for her while baring his face into her neck.

They just toke comforter from one other for a moment until he finally push inside her broking her barrier with a gently but swift thrust until he was fully sheath inside. Merlin painfully moan at her broken virgin but that was quickly lost to them the moment he was fully inside of her and they were completely molded together as one that send pulses of unique intensives pleasure through the both of them down to their very soul, like if they were two piece that had broken apart from one another but had union again to merge into one being. It felt right, good, full and more complete then whenever Merlin was only standing beside him. Nothing could compare to it and from Merlin awe writing face she was feeling the same as him.

It didn't take him long to be lost to the instant to move slowly that send shots of pleasure down their body melting them together into a hot bliss pile of limbs and leaving them yell out their feelings in loud unrestricted screams, "AHA!" He soon quicken his long thrust to quick rimming's building them up into a cliff of glories pleasure which they fell over screaming while wrapped so tightly on to one another that there was barely an inch apart from their bodies. He pump his seed inside of her mindless that he had just planted his first future child inside of his friend and left their twitching body's in their orgasmic after effects. Not even after the afterglow vanish leaving them exhausted and had them falling asleep still cling to one another sweating bodies did he realizes what they had just done.

**Dee1001:** First thanks for liking my story. Second sorry for by grammar it was just something I can never really master but I am trying my best here. Third I have tried to get a beta but they just not interested, I do want one but I wouldn't hold my breath on it. If you have any recommends for a beta I'm all ears.

**Loulou2a:** Nice to always see your review and writing Merlin experience in a women body will be very fun to do.

**LadyFromPoland:** It's nice to see your review again and I so happy you like their reactions because that what always worries me the most.


	7. Chapter 7

**Yeah readers, sorry you guys haven't see any new chapters in a while, but with my new job, my beta and me going through my old chapters, I just didn't feel up to writing or didn't have time. So by the time this is up almost all my old work is corrected and I encourage you guys to go read through them, because they are much easier to read now. Also for those of who don't know who my beta is its weepingelm, so go check out her stories and say thanks her for helping me out. Hope you enjoy.**

**I do not own or get money from this stories, because it only for fun. **

**Warnings: Arthur x Merlin, Arthur x Gwen, gender bender, fem Merlin, Het, birthing, character death.**

The Will of Magic

Merlin woke up in the morning with a sore lower body and a hot heavy weight crushing the top of her into the mattress. She knew without even opening her eyes what it was, she knew she would see a peaceful sleeping Arthur laying on her with his head slang over her shoulder. There was dry sweat and sticky cum still on and inside her, add to the heat of another body she was restless to stay there. So she began to move from under him, that when she discovered that he was still inside of her. While it didn't hurt for him to be there it was a little uncomfortable for her, because of both her sores and the thought of them being connected the whole night. That thought made Merlin slide Arthur's head from her shoulder onto to the pillow a little faster than she might otherwise have done and she started to try to wiggle her lower body from beneath Arthur's without waking him up with her struggles.

She had only broken their union halfway when his blue eyes opened and he looked around to see what had awoken him up into the world, it didn't take long for them to land on her and she stared back with a guilty, sleepy face. They only looked at one another's faces for a moment, until Arthur ran his eyes down Merlin's body to see for himself that they are still partly join together. He sat up and pulled out of her, making her flinch as the movement that hurt her sensitive parts.

"Sore?" Arthur asked with a little worry to his voice.

She nodded 'yes' and hoped she would not be walking funny for the rest of the day. Merlin tried to sit up properly without tensing her face to deeply but the king pushed her back down into the bed and laid partly on top of her.

His face was close to hers when he said, "I shouldn't have been so rough with you at the end. If just moving makes you hurt then walking is going to make it worse." Arthur signed before continuing, "I wish it didn't have to be like this."

Merlin didn't blame him for this, because she didn't try to stop it either and didn't think it would be possible for them to control that powerful feeling when it came over them. Beside it was probably going to happen again tonight and Merlin would be taking by it, shamed but willingly.

"Can you magic up your tub into here?" Arthur then asked while flicking his fingers in the air showing how he thought she did magic.

"You mean summon my tub in a tiny space that barely can hold a bed." Merlin asked scathingly.

"Yes." He confirmed encouragingly

She sighed at the demand, but then thought of how she would be able to do it. There was only enough space to walk around the room, so she would have to get rid of the chest sitting in the front of the bed, but even with that it was going to be wedge between the bed and the wall, solidly blocking the path to walk to the other side of the room. But it would be in here and while she was at it she could summon the water, then warm it until it would sooth the tensest of body. So Merlin switched the chest for her tub and like predicted it barely fitted the space. Then she watched as the clear water she summoned appeared from the bottom of the barrel filling it until it almost hit the rim.

Arthur got up from the bed and begin putting his clothes on, he spoke to Merlin while his back was facing her, "I'll be out for just a minute while you heat up the water."

Then he left out the door without looking back at her. Merlin heart became heavy wondering if he was going to go see his wife this morning, but then surely he wouldn't run the risk of hurting her this early? Whatever he was going to check on it wouldn't be Gwen. So all she could do was heat up the liquid sitting in front of her until steam was rising into the air around her, heated enough to massage her muscles. Now if she could only walk into the tub and relax her sore body. In fact a bath would be good for the both of them, because she was sure she wasn't the only one covered in sweat and cum.

As if the thought had link to the one she was thinking of, for the king walked back into the room holding a plate full of cheeses, slices of cold ham, bread and grape tomatoes that were still on the vine for breakfast. Merlin's stomach groaned at the sight of the food and Arthur chuckled at the noise as he set down the plate by her feet. She would have grabbed some if after putting it down he hadn't pulled her legs under his arm and then slung the other hand along her back, then with a jerk of his head to show that he wanted her to hold on to him. Merlin did as she was bid without thinking.

He carried her naked body to the bath and slowly dipped her into the relaxing waters. She felt better as the water loose her muscles and wash away the mess on her skin, making her hum and sink her body deeper into the water until her head was just above the surface. The moment was broken by the roar of a noise her stomach made again. Arthur laughed behind her, "You're as skinny as a colt but eat more than a wolf. Doesn't your body not know how to gain weight?" Arthur mocked.

She almost fell into old habit of answering him back and to comment about the one who really gains the pounds around here. But the piece of cheese being held to her lips stopped her from speaking and instead she stared at Arthur's smiling face as he spoke. "I don't want you to get water on the food, so go ahead and eat in there."

Merlin took it between her lips and chewed it, she noticed of how differently Arthur was treating her. It could be because she was a girl now and he was nicer to the fairer sex, or it could be because of what he had requested her help with? Either way she wasn't sure if she should be scared of this new relationship. When she eventually will be back to her original gender, Merlin feared he would reform back to his old self once she is normal again after she had birth their child. Although she loved bantering with Arthur, she wasn't sure if they could keep being that way with a child learning about how to deal with the world around it. She wouldn't want their child to get a bad example from them.

Arthur didn't notice her quietness and he kept holding food up to her mouth, then feeding himself in between her bits. She wiped the crumbs of bread from her mouth using her tongue and looked up to Arthur to see he had moved his eyes down to the plate on his lap.

"You should wash yourself before you start getting wrinkly", he said in a calm tone. She probably shouldn't sit there naked in front of him like this, the fact that they both didn't feel bother by it didn't revealed to her what that meant for them. Was it that they were just comfortable with one another, or because they had already seen all of what you would normally hide from others?

While she was thinking about this, she unconsciously summoned a rag and quickly washed away the rest of the dirt from her body. Once done she was about to get out of the tub on her own, but as she leant out over rim Arthur stood up and carried her off to the bed, just like he did before. Merlin noticed that neither of them took any notice that she was undressed. But also that Arthur seem to care more about her health, as he placed her directly into the sunlight coming through the window, so she could dry faster in the warmth, as there was no fireplace in the small room. He didn't seem worried about stepping over that visible line of not letting this become personal between them.

Arthur undressed himself again and got into the dirty water of her bath. Merlin watched him, not in any lustful way, but like at artist examining its subject. For the first time Merlin was really looking at his body in the light of day. The muscles that moved his limbs as he cleaned himself and that had held her body close to his, his penis that now hang limp in between his legs, that pushed had inside of her and that made her feel good while he had encouraged her with his words. Arthur didn't realized he was being stare at, because he was too busy making sure he would look just as kingly as any other day, like the people expected him to be.

She watch him until he is done and as he was moving over onto the bed, she patted the spot next to her in the heat of the sun. He moved over, to lay his body alongside hers with their hips touching and that's how they both ended up in the bed naked together once more. It should have be awkward for the both of them, but as the light showed off their bodies their curiosity was aroused as to what the other really look like. Now when Merlin was Arthur manservant she has helped him bath and dress many times before, but she never looked for the fine details of his build, of the scars, of the way his muscles curved and bulk up, of the golden little hairs that were lifted up to the cold of the room and the way he held himself even when he was laying down. These details make her interest peek for this was the body that was going to make a child within her. Which parts of Arthur would come to be in this new form of life? Maybe she was thinking too much into it, but she couldn't seem to help herself because it felt like it was too important to her to not give all this a thought.

Arthur looked at her with searching eyes and asked her, "I have a meeting this morning, will you be all right on your own?"

He must be still worry about her soreness, which thanks to the bath it wasn't as bad as when she had first started working as his manservant. But she knew she would most likely will be walking funny today anyway. So Merlin nodded her head and gave him an encouraging smile. The water that had clung to them had been absorbed by the heat, so they dressed and stood before the door looking at one other not knowing what to say, Merlin thought there was no more words to say, but somehow Arthur found away. "Meet you back here tonight?"

She know only one response to that and nodded. He gave her the gentlest smile he has ever given to her, then unexpectedly pulled her head forward and kiss her forehead, making her heart warm and beat faster. Then as if what he had done was nothing unusual he walked out, leaving Merlin with a blank and confused mind.

Maybe he did it because he wanted to show his support and affection, but it make her worry once more about his change in mood around her. Could they be crossing the line of friends to lovers, if so how can she tell that's what was happening? They couldn't stop their plans now that they came this far, she could after all be pregnant this very moment. To be scared off by something she couldn't even confirm wouldn't look good or sit well with others.

But there was nothing she could do about it now, so she left to go back to her own chambers to look over some papers as she had only one small meeting to attend to today. Joan wasn't in her chambers when Merlin stepped in that morning, probably because she knew Merlin wasn't going to be in her room last night to mess it up. Merlin didn't mind and was grateful to be alone to do some mindless work. But first she changed into some loose clothes for she wasn't planning on going outside of these walls and then walked to the pile of papers laying on her desk, all stacked in different piles depending on what they were about.

Merlin spent the morning doing light work, looking over numbers, reports and signing her approval. She was so deep into making sure everything was running smoothly when she heard the door open she thought it was Joan, with some lunch for her and didn't even look up when the plate of food was set in front of her. Grabbed the slide of bread from the side of a plate of stew, she put it in her mouth nearly choking on it when she heard not Joan, but the queen of Camelot say, "You sure are pretty as a girl." Jerking straight up with the bread barely staying in her mouth, she very nearly accidently spat it at Gwen face.

"GWEN!?", she yelled out in shock. Now Merlin hadn't been planning on seeing her queen until she had to, hopefully when she was with child and she had been expecting the same from Gwen. But there she was, standing before her staring at her with her usual smile on her face and not any of the awkwardness, shame or hate that Merlin had imagined seeing.

"Stand up and let me have a better look at you" Gwen continued as if this was any normal day for the both of them. Coming around the desk to grab on to Merlin's arms she pull her up on to her feet, to get a better view of Merlin. Then Gwen looked down Merlin's body and for the first time Gwen frowned, like she didn't approve of something and said, "You need better fitting clothes."

The Queen stretched and pulled Merlin's clothes on her shoulders, chest and waist area to show her point, saying, "These are too tight in the chest and hips, while your arms are not long enough to fill the sleeves and your pants don't fit at all"

Gwen pulled on the sleeves until they went pass Merlin's palm and only stopped when her finger tips were peeking out of the cuff. Merlin's clothes may not have been make for a woman's body, but it doesn't mean that she needed a dress because she was now female, Merlin's male mind refused the very thought of it. Even if he had worn one once before, it was only to complete the disguise of the old women that he had done so. Merlin could tell from Gwen's eyes as she inspected her clothes and knowing her old profession, as a ladies maid, she was in trouble. "I will not wear a dress", Merlin warned.

"Ah… but I wanted to see the whole transformation", a very familiar voice said from the queen side, making her turn towards Gwaine. The child like knight's eyes stretched wide open when he saw her face and said in an unstrained impressed tone, "Merlin if you want babies so bad you could have just come to me and I would have willingly helped you out, without the kingdom needs."

Being on familiar territory Merlin went along with it by saying, "I would have if the thought of you being a father wasn't so discouraging."

"I would have been a kind, loving and strong father to have. What better father can there be", He said confidently while waving off her comment. That was one of the things she always liked about the strong knight, he could go into any situation and go along with it as if he had always be a part of it, like a leaf flowing down a stream with no direction or restriction by the water. While that life style left him irresponsible, it also where Gwaine's fun side came from.

"While you'll teach your child how to drink everyone under the table before its five…"

"What wrong with teaching it a little bit early?" he quipped.

"As well as show it how to disrespect authority" Merlin continued to pick on his non-existing parenting skills.

Gwaine fought back "You don't even listen to Arthur half the time and the chances of your child following your example are very high."

Shaking her head with a smile Merlin said, "Not to be cruel, but it would be better if my child didn't listen to that prat, than have you teach it how to pick up the opposite gender whenever it's happen to see one." Throwing the argument that he couldn't possibly argue with Gwaine surrendered this fight and put his hands up in the air, but still with a smile on his face.

Gwen just laughed at them both. This is why Merlin loved being around the knight so much, because he could somehow clear the air of any tension and make them feel more relaxed, she might have be the only one to feel that way but it still helped.

"Now what was this about not wearing a skirt?" Gwaine asked.

"Merlin needs some new clothes that fit her better", Gwen replied and showed the sleeve she had pulled down so the knight would get her point.

Merlin didn't care if the clothes didn't fit, how could she keep her dignity if everyone was constantly making jokes about her wearing a dress.

"You need something that makes you feel comfortable, while looking appropriate for a women in the eyes of the kingdom, for they will be watching you and you will also need bigger clothes for when you start to grow with your child. And no male clothes are going to keep your stomach from tearing them apart", Gwen stated and that reminded Merlin of all the things she will need during the pregnancy.

"Maybe you should do something in between the expecting genders", Gwaine said, interrupting Merlin's thoughts.

In one of his rare thoughtful moments Gwaine suggested "Something made fit for a girl but stays true to Merlin's manhood so she can feels comfortable."

"Yes", Gwen responded with her eyes glowing bright with excitement, she grabbed a piece of paper from Merlin desk and with the quill Merlin had been using all that morning, drew out thick lines without halting or hesitating as she come up with a design. As the lines came together Merlin at first dreaded that it looked like a dress until Gwen got to the bottom part of the outfit where she cut it off above the knees and continue making more lines to make pants in the plan. It was simply a short dress that was cut off by the knee, with long sleeves, a v neckline that wasn't too low, and slits down the sides starting from the hip to the end of the skirt. The shortest made it look less girly, having both the slits and pants would make it easier for Merlin to move about while showing he was accepting her female role. It was perfect, which is unusual for somebody that had just drawn it out for the first time, with no mistakes or second thoughts and especially as she hasn't made clothes for years now. Merlin thought that maybe while Merlin was with Arthur, Gwen had been thinking about her comforts and needs.

Merlin wasn't sure what she should feel about that, should she be glad that Gwen wasn't jealous and be happy that she was being supported, should she be grateful that someone else was thinking about the situation beside her? Or be sad that the only thing keeping Gwen from thinking about her husband was giving thought about the one he was lying in bed with or the future baby they are trying to create and pitied her for that was probably the only thing Gwen could think about for many more nights to come.

"What do you think Merlin", Gwen said with hope of approval shining in her eyes.

"It's perfect" Merlin replied for it was just the thing she needed and was secretly pleased to give the queen something to do with her hands besides sitting in her chambers alone thinking of Merlin and Arthur.

Gwen smiled and then took more blank paper from Merlin's desk and began drawing more designs. With her head bend down towards her work Gwen said, "Good, because we have many more clothes we need to make. You'll need some bigger things for when you sleep… and have the proper clothes for feasts, cloaks, undergarments… oh we must get you some more comfortable shoes. It will help your feet for when you have to hold that extra weight."

And that continue for a long while, but Merlin went along with it. Gwen drew the designs, Gwaine commenting on them and Merlin approving them. By the time that the queen was satisfied she had more than 20 designs to make and looked quite happy about it. Merlin was happy to get some looser clothes and to help out her friend, Gwaine just seem happy to be there like always. But he was the first to leave when it was time for him to meet up with the other knights, at the Rising Sun Inn, him making jokes as he closed the door, leaving just Gwen and Merlin alone once more.

Except this time Merlin didn't feel worried about it, but it still make her wonder why her friend was still standing there with her when she had all she needed. Merlin hoped she didn't stay by her side to speak about the one thing that was stuck between them.

With a pile of papers held against her chest Gwen instead asked an unusual question. "Are you alright Merlin...I mean", she hesitated, choosing her words carefully, just like she use to do when Merlin first come to Camelot, all the time twisting her hands around as if she was trying to force the words out of her mouth, "Was Arthur kind with you…I mean it wasn't bad, was it?"

Of all the questions Gwen could have asked her it was the one Merlin was sure she wouldn't have wanted the queen to hear, but she had asked and guilt settled inside Merlin's stomach. While on the outside her face turned red as a sweet apple and the warlock couldn't make her mouth open, even when she knew the answer was a positive one, Merlin couldn't talk about the intense sex she had with the king, not to his wife. Let alone talk about it with one of her closest friends.

When the silence hung around the two too long, Gwen realized she wouldn't get an answer and so said "You don't need to answer. But you know that I am here for you all right? I mean…I asked for this and I even fought for this, I know what was going to happen between you two. I'm not going to get angry or jealous at you for something that I wanted to happen" she said calmly.

But still Merlin didn't speak, she could only look back at Gwen with a sad understanding look. For she understood what Gwen was saying, but the things that they had felt and said would never leave that room, keeping the secrets between the two people and the walls of the tower. Sighing the queen said, "I think I'm going to ask for some fabric to be sent to me. But hopefully by tomorrow I can get some clothes done for you, if I work through the night." Then she left the room, before Merlin could say that wasn't necessary for her to do that amount work.

Merlin worried that maybe she was too cold to Gwen, but the sick feeling swimming in her stomach couldn't let her be anything else. In her heart Merlin didn't believe her friend when she said there wouldn't be any negative feelings between them. Gwen had spoken like there shouldn't be any other reaction, but Merlin still expected it to come. She wondered why in her heart Gwen couldn't be anything else.

"My lord", came a voice from behind her. Calmly she turn around to the dark corner of the room where two dark eyes were staring out of a tall shadow. Thomas one of the many agencies of Merlin investigation department and the one who uses magic to moves in the dark. "What do you have to report Thomas?" she ask in caution voice. "The people have not shown change to the expected reaction. Most likely waiting to see what is to come of your effect."

"Good, keep your eyes on them but I want a second pair on the research department", she order. With only the color of his eyes to see Merlin could never really tell what Thomas thought, but she could hear the curiosity in his voice when he ask, "do you think they would ignore the law and you?" Merlin tilt her head to the side when she answer that, "They are obsess with the limits of magic. I don't want any unnecessary experiments happening that would be against the law and when the life of my child is on uneven ground."

"As you wish my lord", he agreed and blinking his eyes once which he did not reopen, leaving Merlin alone to think again.

This thoughts stayed with Merlin until nightfall, making the walk to Arthur's and her chambers an uneasy one. When she opened the door to find Arthur already laying back on the bed staring up at the ceiling. Only with a quick flash of his eyes as she moved towards him showed her that he knew she had join him, they went back to the hard wood above his head, seem to return to his thoughts, when she sat down.

"After we left the chamber this morning I went to seek out Gwen", he started to speak and then waited for a moment before continuing, "We won't be doing anything tonight, not until I know you will be healed. Tomorrow would be better." He continued as if he never started out by saying something different, normally she would have wanted him to speak what was on his mind but instead asked.

"Then why are we here Arthur?"

He turned his blue eyes to where she was sitting, they reflected something that she herself felt familiar with that day. "Because I couldn't sleep next to Gwen", he said, "When I stood before her it's as if I am facing an enemy but without a sword or armor to protect me and waiting for the worse to happen."

"You expecting to be punish by her", she revel, "I thought the same thing. But we are not going to be punished, we not even going to get any disproving looks or anger from her."

"I SHOULD BE!" He yelled out, making her jerk away from him, as he crossed his arms to cover his eyes. Arthur would of course feel more strongly about this than her, because not only would he feel like he was hurting his friend and his wife but he would feel he was betraying his loyalty even if it was to do what was right for them. Then when his rage seemed to burn out his said, "We enjoy it Merlin. To the point that I lust for it again and I should only feel that way about my wife, because I love Gwen."

"I know", Merlin agreed with him and put her hand on one of his arms, because she know how much Arthur loved Gwen. So she couldn't help but try to make it better by saying, "But it's just lust and desire we are feeling, even if we feel guilty about that it doesn't make it into anything more than those emotions. Gwen's not mad at us because she knows this, she knows that you came here because she has asked you to."

He removed his arm to look into her sympathetic face and slowly his painful eyes begin to melt away, letting him give her a small smile. Then he calmly mocked, "Who could feel anything more than that for some girly dolt like you."

"Lots of people have wanted to court me, I just never fallen in love with them", she said.

"Like who?" Her friend demand.

"Many druid girls, kitchen staff Cade, chamber maid Bruice, Duchess Dena, Duchess Ewinda, High Priest Amice, Grand Duchess Fleta, Countess Goldwine, Gwen's handmaid Laila, Princess Magge…", she continue on and on with list of maidens names, with each name that came Arthur's face became more and more shocked.

This is what they needed to get back to, their normal banter. Because the guilt sitting in their stomachs won't just going to go away, they would have to grow used to it and accept it. They will have to do that together, like Gwen had said it is easier doing something like this with your best friend then a stranger. For she felt better with Arthur companionship on this journey and seeing the small smile on her king face meant he must feel the same.

**Lady of Poland: I'm glad you like their first act together so much. It was what I hope people would take away from it and you got it perfect. **

**Princessjolie: You're right about the spelling of his name. But Merlin will not be keeping Arthur from is child, but he needs a safety net against any situation that could harm his child because of his unusual birth. Now if that was done in real life I would have agree with you, but stories need drama or it will get boring. **

**20000 WPM: I makes me so happy to know that somebody was impression with my story on their first read. Complicated emotion would be a good predicting with this story. **

**Princessdabomb: I can't say if there will still be attraction when he is a male but it something you should be looking forward to found out. And thanks for liking my story.**

**Luka Knight: Sorry this took so long but here it is, hope you enjoy it.**

**The Third Biker Scholar: Thanks and hope you enjoy it. **

**Lightingmist95: I am so glad you like my story so much. Gammier is my weakness suit so any help I am willing to take. If you really want to help just PM me and I will respond as soon as possible.**

**b92morgan: Here it is, hope you like it. I can't said weather they will have more kids, but I love that you would look so deep into my story, so look forward to it.**

**Laurancethelorax: I don't know about other people, but when I see the chapters on my computer I can see them just fine. So it might be your ipod. But I can't really say.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Wow it feels like it been a year since I writing much of anything. Now I could fault my work load for that, but I just haven't felt the need to create in a while and I would like to finish this story, so I wanted to warn you guys that to reach that goal it will take me a very long time. I also wanting to open my story to adopting, for I wanted to see if anyone else could finish it or rework it better than me. I am looking for a writer with ability to finish their stories and have better grammar or use of words then me, if you meet those then contact me by PM or in the comments. **

**Warning: gender bender, female merlin, merlin x Arthur, Gwen x Arthur, birth, character death, het, birthing, slash.**

**The Will of Magic**

What could Merlin say to the event of the days that came after her first meeting, than that they adapt. Now it wasn't as if their concerns could have vanish throughout those days, they lived, but everyone just seems to be waiting. Waiting to see if this would work, for a peep of rebelling to whisper in their ears or maybe for one of them to abandon this plan. Whatever clanged to the minds to make them stop talking or acting out; gave Merlin a time of peace as she does her pleasure and mission with Arthur.

Now Merlin couldn't form the right words to describe what intense pleasure they felt when their body connected. And with all the resources she had with mystic and biology she couldn't reason why that act only was the pulley of that powerful reaction, so to say that Merlin quickly gave up once no easy solution came out of her research was reasonable. After all from this one detail, which she and king keep between themselves, was a grain compare to a bag of gold of everything else.

Like the queen who brought about this events. She was still a little strange around Gwen, nothing she done of course had make her this way. Just the vision of her made the thoughts of_ her having intimate relation with her love and I am a women because of it, _it was an unusual situation that not even her worse drunken delusional could come up with. With this odds against their friendship she was the only one who seem to feeling to be on uneven landing.

She and Arthur however were surprisingly almost even better around the other than before this. It was probably because of the gently side that showed through this moments of fear and rawest that makes it easier to open themselves up more, and not only in a sexual way. While Arthur made sure she had her pleasure and Merlin keep her body relaxed and open for him, their also been to be more physical touch like kisses on the front head when she leaves, a nice pats on the shoulder or a few rare hugs.

Or like where Merlin was now, within the once and future king arms without a piece of cloth on her body. She resting her head upon his shoulder has she looked at his peaceful face without really seeing it. Thinking on how long a path she has taking to be here and how long she still had to go to keep all her work together, but she couldn't say that she would do things differently and Arthur seemed to be with her on that.

That was when a sicken feel develop over her, an illness that unsettled from her stomach pulling at her muscle into broking from Arthur arms and pulling the chamber pot from under the bed. As Merlin heave into it, she awaking Arthur and he tied her long hair back with one hand while rubbing her back with the other. After her stomach had enough of trying to choke up all the food out of her, the king got some water for her to rid of the taste of bile. That was when she smiled.

**OK shorter chapter than usual, but it feels better this way and it easier for me to work on. **

**Killua17: Thanks**

**Rowenna J. Anderson: I could hardly believe that somebody like my story that much. Sorry for taking so long, but I will try not leave this story unfinished.**

**The Third Biker Scholar: I with you on Gwaine, he is my second favorite character after Merlin. **

**20000 WPM: That is understandable. The warning for character death was always there, but there are a lot of warnings so it can have easily been skip.**

**Felinebln: Thanks for thinking so.**

**Magpie1600: here more!**

**LadyFromPoland: So many problems, but all for the reward.**

**Loulou2a: glad you like it.**

**Lightingmist95: your wish is granted, but after a long wait.**

**b92morgan: here it is. That parts was more to point out that if their child is a girl people may not accept a female ruler, especial with them being able to create more children. But whether they have more than one you'll have to see. **

**Kimmiko T: Here you go.**


	9. Chapter 9

Hey readers, oh my god I didn't update after a million years had gone by. I am patting myself on the back right now for getting back on the creative horse. Now with that self-praise out of the way, don't get your hopes up on regular updates, because I don't know if I keep this consistent.

Disclaimer: Do not own or receive any money from this story, it is only for fun.

Warning: Het, slash, Merlin x Arthur, Gwen x Arthur, gender bender, birth, character death, fem/merlin.

**The Will of Magic**

_Arthur POV_

Arthur could say he was cautionly happy after Merlin stop heaving into the chamber pot. For him this wouldn't be the first time where he thought the future stand clearly before him only to be an illness or misunderstanding.

But with how Merlin was smiling in such a small curving of the lips, it somehow felt different than the other times, almost new and he couldn't ruin that with his concerns. So without a word they dress and with the sunlight barely touching the land, even before most of the servants would start to begin their daily chores, they crept down into the healer chambers.

Arthur thought they almost kill the man from fright when they awaked him and with him unprepared to accept royal or noble companion had him rubbing his hand together in bare thin nervous still in his night shirt has they told him. That was when the man beat down the new man at court and a healer came out. He led Merlin into her old room, now use has a private chambers to perform his tests. Arthur entertain himself with looking around the room, the organization and neatness had vastly improve from when Gaius lived here or Merlin own rooms. Research paper neatly stack, herbs hanging to the window to be dried and then put away, the leech tank had never had a cleaner glass case, potions and equipment store away around the cupboards. In a way it was still unusual for him to see the state of this chambers so different from how he grow use to them, but Arthur learn a long time ago that nothing can be kept the same for time will claims all.

After a few hours of waiting he was found by the two scholars picking at the glass where a leech had travel up the tank and was suck at where his finger was. He knew from her face only, because it hadn't change the way Gwen's did from hope to shame and pain. Small tears of relief round down his cheeks as he got up and huge her. He whisper so only she could hear, "You did it."

"Congratulations your highness, I shall prepare the announcement to the courts", he said when they pull away. "Arthur can we keep it to our self for a little bit longer?" Merlin ask him quickly. Flinn was about to politely argue but he waved him off silently. "The courts have waited years for an heir they will wait for a few more days."

But there was one who couldn't wait and they couldn't refuse her. Gwen nearly knock her on her back when she run to give Merlin a huge. After righting her back up she kneeled down in front of the warlock's stomach, putting her hands gently on the flat surface and saying, "Welcome little one, you won't be aware of it just yet. But you are meant for a great and noble future. With a might kingdom to rule, all of its most powerful people to guide your hand and the rest to throw awe upon you. The world will be open to you in all ways and we can't wait to have you." Merlin let her coo, awe and speak about the future to her stomach. They both knew what this meant for her.

_One week later_

The voices of a million conversations ring out over the other, children yelling nonsense and babies crying all echoing throughout the court yard and towards the city limits. People from all over where milling around for the awaited announcement from the king. Although the news had not been leak through the whispers of the court there was still a feeling of excitement from the crowd. Arthur would image that only the dull, dumb and fairy touched wouldn't know what would be spoking today.

"You need a little more jewelry", Gwen said from behind him. "If you put anymore shiny things on me I will look like one of those daughters of the noble houses trying to catch the eyes of wealth husband", a put off Merlin said after her. Merlin was standing there in Gwen handmade blue dress, a long tunic and pants mix with a belt hooping around her middle ending with one the ends hanging by her front; the sign of the druids, three swirls being connected in the middle with a circle surrounding the hole of the design, needle in gold, and sitting proudly upon her chest. Gwen had put on her a red bejewel cape that hanged off her shoulder and was trying to get her to wear rings that had large rare minerals that only his house could spend that coins on.

"Merlin you are to be the mother of the child to this vast kingdoms your importance needs to be shown."

"She fine, we need to address the people", Arthur interprets. The most powerful magical being run to the doors quickly to escape Gwen worrying. Then they walk out together his love on his arm and his best friend by his other side onto the balcony. The silence of millions shush over the crowd echoing in his ears, he spoke, "My people you have set in silences waiting for you future to be read to you. Thank you for giving a man a chance to prove another path can be made from the future you all expected. For now I am happy to tell we have succeed in our method and our faith", Arthur pause to pull Merlin forward with him, "Emry had become carrier of your heir and mother of our future."

The roar of the crowd block any other sound for entering the city.

b92morgan: Thank you for the love you have for my story and the kindness to me.

Killua17: I like you theories, but you'll have to wait and see.

LadyFromPoland: I happy I am back too and hopeful with longer updates.

Kimmiko T: thanks.

Luka Knight: all I got is *smiley face*.

The Third Biker Scholar:*evil laugh* what will happen?


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